All Around Me
by KGould02
Summary: Quinn tries relentlessly to get over her feelings for Rachel, but is finding it increasingly difficult. Rated T but may change to M later on.
1. 20 Dollar Nose Bleed

**Hello everyone. So as was said in the summary, I had this dream a while back and now I'm trying to write it all out. But with all dreams, many details are left out and that's where my "creative" side has to come out, which I'm not very good at. So please bear with me. I've written this much just to see if anyone is interested in reading this. I have the main layout of the story, just not the details of it, so we shall see what happens.**

**Ennnnnnjoy!**

She was pissed. That much was certain.

It was written all over her face. From her slouched posture and her crossed arms to her scrunched brows, her square jaw, the sneer over her lips, and the flames shooting out of her eyes at what she was witnessing.

Seeing the two "lovebirds" dance and sing around made her skin crawl. _That should be me up there with her, singing about _our _love that we have together. Can't anyone else see what a train wreck they are together? _Her eyes darted around the room to see if anyone else shared her opinion, unfortunately all eyes were glued on the performing couple. It made her stomach turn that everyone was buying into this. She resituated herself in her chair in attempt to ease the nausea building up. It didn't work.

She was glad that she opted to sit in the far back corner, far away from her other glee clubbers. Once she got wind that the couple was to perform this afternoon, she knew how she would react and how she would feel about seeing them being so close; the exact same way she did every time she caught sight of them being cozy.

Every touch on the arm, every loose strand of hair pushed behind her ear by his clumsy hand; every time she saw their eyes lock with the metaphorical sparkle between them made her utterly sick. Especially after what had happened between the two girls.

The events of that night couldn't stop playing in her head as much as she willed them too. She tried relentlessly to push it out of her head, to act like it didn't happen just like the other girl had seemed to do without much effort. The harder she tried, the more vivid they played back in her head. Try as she might, she couldn't help but feel her lips curl up in a smirk and her heart beat a little faster as she ducked her head to hide it. But almost as soon as it started, she looked back up at the couple who were finishing their dreadfully adorable duet and her heart sank back down to where it's been for months.

She just didn't understand what went wrong and where or how. Well, okay maybe she did know _where_ it went wrong, but that didn't explain the what and how. They had been getting along just fine with no one really questioning it, besides Santana with her quips here and there. But even she was getting used to the pair being friends. Everything was going so well. They confided in each other, one with her boy troubles and the other with her daily life problems afraid to delve too far in her emotions when in the company of the other girl. She had always known she had feelings for the girl but was far too afraid, or maybe prideful, to bring herself to admit it to anyone else. Until that one night. The one night everything took a turn for the worst.

Their talking had become more intimate in the sense that they were sharing secrets they knew they could never trust anyone else with. They spoke about Beth, and how the blond felt it was weird that she and Puck had never once conversed about her or that she's never spoken to anybody about it but for some reason she could trust her diva friend, perhaps because she could relate in a way. And she could. The brunette spoke about Shelby, how she was so close to finally having a mother she had always wanted just to find out her mother didn't want her. Quinn couldn't help but feel like she had abandoned Beth the way Shelby had done to Rachel. But Rachel was there to ease her pain and comfort her just like a friend the blond never had. But she did now, she had Rachel as a friend and she cherished it more than anything. It was only when their talking became a bit too intimate that…

She was snapped out of her trance by the sound of clapping around the room. Her body bolted up straight and her automatic response was to join in the applause until she realized what everyone was applauding and she resumed her previous position of slouching and shooting daggers from her eyes at the two singers. Once the applauding came to a close, they took their seats beside each other with the boy grabbing onto the girls thigh as they looked into each other's eyes, each silently congratulating the other on a job well done. The girl sitting in the back had to fight her gag reflex at how cheesy the two were being.

Once they were dismissed for the day, the remaining clubbers went to further congratulate the duo on their song. _When will it end?_ The girl sitting thought to herself looking up at the ceiling, willing God himself to take her out of this situation, or maybe to send a lightning bolt to the boy holding the girl of her dreams hand. As much as the bitter girl didn't want to admit, she still had feelings for the love struck girl. She hated it, but it was true. It ate at her every second of everyday but she was done fighting it. She accepted the fact that she would always have these feelings for the singer, but there's nothing that could be done about it. However, that wouldn't stop her from being as bitter as ever about the fact that she could never have her.


	2. The Artist in the Ambulance

**Hello again everyone. Here is the second chapta of this story. I'm going to try to do something a little different than what I've seen done. I'm going to try to incoporate a song in each chapter to explain certain parts that I feel I can't do justice with words (if you didn't notice, the title of the story is a song from Flyleaf and the title of the first chapter is a song from Fall Out Boy). For those of you who have seen the movie "Across the Universe", you know what I mean. For instance, there's a song in this chapter that I feel like really encompasses what Quinn is going through at the time. I'll probably end up doing it every chapter, as long as you guys like it. Just let me know once you guys get this through with this and see how what I have in mind. If not then I'll try something either limiting the songs or trying to explain everything to the best of my ability, although I am much more musically creative than I am with words, but we'll just have to see how it pans out. I hope you guys like it either way.**

**Eeeeeeenjoy!**

* * *

6:52. She lie awake staring at her ceiling, cursing herself that she's awake even before her alarm goes off. But this is the way it's been ever since she decided to fight her feelings with all her might towards one Rachel Berry.

Quinn Fabray had always known there was something special she felt towards the tiny girl. She just learned to downplay it with being a bitch; that was the logical thing to do, right? At first it was all fine and dandy, Quinn would ignore her until that was no longer an option and then either say or do something to the poor girl to put her back in her place for a little while longer. Even her relationship with Finn had been mainly a lie. Sure the blond cared for the boy but the real reason she started dating him was because he was popular and she wanted to be popular, so she put two and two together. She never intended on staying with him however, it was only when she saw Rachel show interest in her boyfriend that she knew she could play it to her advantage. And she did every chance she got. Whether it be interrupting the twos conversation while effectively lowering the brunettes hopes of them ever being together, or showing public displays of affection any chance she saw Rachel which would result in the girl running off somewhere in the opposite direction.

The messed up thing about it was that Quinn liked it, she liked it a lot. She loved having that power over someone like Rachel, someone who fought for everything she wanted, and many times got it. Quinn had something the girl couldn't have, no matter how hard she fought. It was the hold she had on the girl, the fact that she knew Finn would never leave her, especially for someone like Rachel, and how she could treat the girl like crap and no one ever questioned it, they just encouraged it.

But as we all know, that all has changed since freshman year. Quinn's world was turned upside down at the start of her sophomore year at McKinley High. She remembers it all like it was yesterday.

* * *

She had been at her locker, talking with Finn, Puck, Santana and Brittany along with the rest of the cheerios and football team. It was a normal first day of school with them talking about their classes and the upcoming football season and whatnot. Quinn and Finn were standing together, holding hands when she caught sight of her for the first time. Well, of course she had seen Rachel plenty of times over the years, but it felt like she was seeing her with new eyes, or something; she never could quite put words to it.

"Well then we have English together. Good, at least I'll know someone in there." Quinn said, inspecting Santana's schedule. Turns out that none of her other friends shared any of other classes. _That's what you get for being the smart one I guess._

"Quinn you know everyone in this school." Brittany said looking between the two girls. "Why would it matter if Santana's in your class or not?"

"I just like having a good friend like Santana to keep me company during class." Quinn said, wrapping her arms around her friends shoulder with a wide smile. Which Santana quickly shrugged off.

"Don't be getting all chummy Q, I'm taken. Try not to be too heartbroken." The dark haired swung her arm around the taller blond. Both cheerleaders looked lovingly at each other and quite frankly, made Quinn want to puke despite the small smile that formed around the corners of her lips.

Ever since Brittany and Santana got together, things have been much calmer around the school. The McKinley student body was eternally grateful that the duo was together because this meant Santana Lopez was happier than usual, which in turn meant that there were less slushies going around and just an all around better feel around the school grounds.

"Don't worry S, I'll try n…" Quinn was cut off when her eyes drifted behind the two girls at the front door of the school. Her eyes scanned the girl walking in, ignoring the loafers and stockings and focusing in on the toned thighs that hid behind the barely there black skirt, to the round of the girls hips, jumping over the hideous argyle sweater to full lips, and piercing brown eyes looking right at back at her. She took in the long, straight brown locks of hair curling slightly at the bottom.

"Damn, when did Berry get hot?" Puck finally broke the silence.

"Seriously. What happened over the summer?" This came from Santana with Brittany nodding alongside her. "So anyway, what were you saying?" They all turned back to Quinn who was practically panting, her eyes still fixed on Rachel. It was only when Santana snapped her fingers in front of her eyes a few times that she finally shook out of it.

"What?" Quinn finally said after she was literally snapped out of her Rachel Berry trance.

Santana looked back over her shoulder at Rachel then back to her cheerleader friend. "Were you just ogling over Berry?" She said with a sly smile.

Quinn finally looked back at her friend as if she had grown two heads. "Is that a joke? She just looks different, it caught me off guard." Santana lowered her head keeping her eyes on Quinn's, effectively giving her _the look_. "That's all. I mean it." Santana just gave her a quick nod in understanding, but not at all believing.

"That's all." Quinn whispered to herself, trying to get her rapid heart and breathing under control. She looked to Finn, who had his seemingly permanent smirk on his face and took his hand in hers as he escorted her to class.

That was the start of it all, the beginning of the end for Quinn. Once she set eyes on Rachel that day, her life was turned around. She no longer desired to be with Finn for his popularity, or any boy for that matter, or to make Rachel feel bad about herself. She enjoyed joining glee just so she could see more of the diva in all her glory, contrary to reasons she stated for joining the club. Her heart soared when Rachel opened her mouth to belt out a solo, her eyes transfixed on the performer never seeming to get enough of the girl. Of course, she could never admit this, even to herself. She kept up her charades of keeping Rachel on the lowest totem pole in the school, using the girl's feelings for her boyfriend as her number one weapon, and the slushies tended to make an appearance every now and then when that didn't work. Or just when Quinn wanted something new.

That had been almost a year and a half ago. Since then, she had gotten pregnant, tried to mask the father as Finn, lost her boyfriend to the lie once the secret surfaced due to one tiny brunette in an attempt to sabotage their relationship in which she succeeded and now the blond had been alone ever since. All during the baby-gate debacle, Finn had a certain member of New Directions to lean on and have her kiss all his boo boos away while Quinn had no one. She thought at least Puck, the baby's father, would make some sort of attempt but he was too busy with Santana at the time to even be bothered with the blonds emotional breakdown. So Quinn did what she does best, pushed her sadness and vulnerability aside and instead opted to focus in on the other side of her brain, the side that always won out in her times of trouble, her bitchy side. But one thing always stayed constant, the one thing she couldn't push away as much as she wanted to, or didn't want to, and that was her feelings for Rachel.

She could never explain it, as much as she pondered the idea and tried to look into her heart for the reason, it just never added up. She didn't think about it too much, or for too long, in fear that it would take over her persona and she would actually be crazy enough to pursue her feelings for the girl. As a result, she just turned even bitterer towards Rachel. She no longer had that hold she once cherished and once took advantage of, and it drove her crazy. She learned to hate the girl because she stole her boyfriend and caused all this drama in her life in the first place, definitely not because her heart would swell when she heard her sing or saw her walk through the hallway everyday during school. And to add icing to her already shitty cake, they had to share every class together. Unfortunately at McKinley, there were more academically standard students compared to gifted kids which caused the faculty to clump all the gifted students in the same classes, hence the two sharing all their classes together. So Quinn was forced to sit and watch the brunette at the front of the room, taking copious amounts of notes, all while hoping one day her glares would finally make some sort of difference, but of course knowing they wouldn't.

* * *

And here she was now, still lying in bed exchanging looks with her clock waiting for the time to pass before she was forced out of bed to get ready for yet another agonizing day at McKinley High. Finally at 7:00 her alarm sounded to a tune on the radio and just when Quinn reached her hand over to shut it off, she recognized the song and a smile crossed her lips to just how close the sing hit to home. _What a better way to express my teenage angst than through song?_ She turned up the volume of her stereo and made her way to the bathroom for her morning shower belting out the familiar tune.

_It's like you're a drug  
__It's like you're a demon I can't face down  
__It's like I'm stuck  
__It's like I'm running from you all the time  
__And I know I let you have all the power  
__It's like the only company I seek is misery all around_

_It's like you're a leech sucking the life of me  
__It's like I can't breathe without you inside of me  
__And I know I let you have all the power  
__And I realize I'm never going to quit you over time_

_It's like I can't breathe  
__It's like I can't see anything  
__Nothing but you  
__I'm addicted to you  
__It's like I can't think without you interrupting me  
__In my thoughts  
__In my dreams  
__You've taken over me  
__It's like I'm not me  
__It's like I'm not me_

_It's like I'm lost  
__It's like I'm giving up slowly  
__It's like you're a ghost that's haunting me  
__Leave me alone  
__And I know these voices in my head are mine alone  
__And I know I'll never change my ways if I don't give up now_

_It's like I can't breathe  
__It's like I can't see anything  
__Nothing but you  
__I'm addicted to you  
__It's like I can't think without you interrupting me  
__In my thoughts  
In my dreams  
__You've taken over me  
__It's like I'm not me  
__It's like I'm not me_

_I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can take it  
__Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it  
__I'll handle it, quit it, just one more time and that's it  
__Just a little bit more to get me through this_

_I'm hooked on you I need a fix I can take it  
__Just one more hit I promise I can deal with it  
__I'll handle it, quit it, just one more time and that's it  
__Just a little bit more to get me through this_

_It's like I can't breathe  
__It's like I can't see anything  
__Nothing but you  
__I'm addicted to you  
__It's like I can't think without you interrupting me  
__In my thoughts  
__In my dreams  
__You've taken over me  
__It's like I'm not me  
__It's like I'm not me_

And with that out of her system she stepped out of the shower with a sigh of content and cleared the fog off the mirror looking back at her reflection as she toweled dry.

"Okay Fabray, pull it together. You're better than this. She's just a person; you can handle getting over her. You're a strong, independent woman who can handle anything the world throws at her; and God knows it's been a hell of a lot within the past year. She's just an annoying goody two shoes, over dramatic diva. You don't need her Fabray, not in the least." She finished combing her wet hair and threw on her robe to walk back down the hallway to her room. She turned her stereo down and walked into her closet to find her usual school attire, her mind still turning over Rachel. "So what if she has the most beautiful eyes you've ever seen? Who cares if she's so adorable when she gets so into a song when she's performing that you just want to scoop her up in your arms and kiss the living daylights out of her?" _Wait, what?_ Quinn had to shake her head to still her thoughts from going any further. "You don't need her and that is final." With a quick nod of her head, she pulled on her cheerio uniform and headed downstairs for some breakfast.

"Good morning honey. Egg sandwich this morning?" Judy welcomed her in the kitchen with the sandwich already set down on the table along with her glass of milk.

Ever since Russell was out of their lives, Judy had really turned around. She finally realized she was practically living her life to suit her ex-husbands needs and was glad to be out of it. Turns out she actually had a knack for scrapbooking and had found a job as a personal scrapbook maker with her own website; there was more demand in it than what you think. She and Quinn had gotten back on track they moved back in with each other and things really couldn't be better between the two.

"Thanks, mom. And good morning to you too." Quinn gulped down her sandwich and milk and was out the door after a quick kiss on the cheek from her mother.

Once she got to school she took a deep breath before opening the car door to get out. _This is the first day of the new you so let's get on with it._ She walked through the doors scoping out to find Santana and Brittany like she does every morning when something, or more precisely _someone_, caught her eye. She had made it a point to avoid Rachel at all costs the past two weeks by studying where was at the start of the school day before the bell rang and sitting as far as possible from her in class, willing her eyes to never look in her general direction. She knew where she sat during lunch, which was never at the cheerios and jocks table for obvious reasons, so that wasn't as big of a deal as long as Quinn's back was to the small diva. Glee was bit more complicated seeing as how there are a limited number of places to hide out. But she made do with sitting in the far back corner while Rachel and Finn always sat front and center. She always told herself to not pay too much attention to Rachel, especially when performing, but that also proved difficult as she simply came alive during said performances. Somehow the blond managed to push through the rehearsals though, leaving as soon as Mr. Scheuster dismissed them and being the first one out the door.

Today however, Quinn caught one glimpse of brown locks and knew she was in trouble. Rachel and Finn always met at Rachel's locker, which was down another hallway from the front door, but they suddenly seemed to change their meeting place to Finn's locker which was conveniently the first set of lockers you walk by on your way in.

"Hey Quinn." The dopey boy caught Quinn's attention towards the pair. The blond froze, hoping to brush by the couple without being seen, and turned on her heel to face the two.

"Hi Finn." _Don't look her Quinn. Be strong._

"Hi Quinn. How are you this morning?" The chipper voice said.

Quinn closed her eyes tight trying to think a way out of this situation. But she couldn't think of one fast enough as her good manners took over. "Hey Rachel. I'm good, what about you?" _Weak, Fabray. Weak._

"I'm doing just wonderful, thank you for asking." Rachel gleamed back, her smile radiating off Quinn's cheerio uniform.

Quinn just gave her a tight lipped smile and nodded her head once. "So did you want something?" She asked, turning her attention towards Finn.

"Um yeah." The boy seemed to struggle to find words, shifting his weight as he looked down at Rachel and then back to Quinn. Quinn looked at him, urging him to continue so she can be on her way. "Can we talk about it a little later? Seems like the bells going to ring soon and I want to make sure we have enough time." Came the cryptic reply.

"Yeah, sure. Whatever Finn." Quinn was about to turn her back to them, not really caring what Finn was talking about, and quite pleased that she didn't pay Rachel more attention when her eyes deceived her. She caught herself gazing down Rachel's body, notably her eyes to her lips to her chest to her hips and finally her thighs. _How the hell does she get away with wearing those things to school?_ It might have been a second, it could have been 30, she really had no idea just how long she was checking Rachel's body out before her body finally turned and her feet carried her away. She wiped the light sweat from her forehead, hoping neither of them noticed how worked up she had gotten from the small encounter. It wasn't until she finally reached the corner of the hallway that she turned away from them and shook out her arms and rolled her head in attempt to regain all her composure; or as much as she could at the time.

"Fuck." She breathed out. "This is going to be harder than I thought."

* * *

**Song: "Addicted" by Kelly Clarkson  
This part is just for my loving and adorable girlfriend: Boobs.**


	3. Bitter Taste

**Hello everyone. So here's chapta 3. Thanks to all of you who have favorited/alerted this story, it really means a lot. And I'm guessing you guys either like, or just don't really have a problem with me using songs in each chapter so I'll continue to do it until someone stops me. Reviews are always welcome and mucho appreciated.**

**But more importantly... eeeeeenjoy!**

* * *

Quinn had been at her locker putting her books away and grabbing her lunch, letting out a big sigh of relief that she'd be free of Rachel for a good 35 minutes. After this morning's little Berry episode and being forced to watch Santana and Brittany exchange lust filled looks between one another (which led them to rush into the bathroom before first period leaving Quinn in their wake), and dealing with seeing and listening to Rachel all through class eagerly answer all the teachers questions, Quinn was ready to relax a little. And plus she was hungry.

She was just about to close her locker when an unwanted visitor joined her at her side. Quinn closed her eyes and dropped her head letting out a deep breath, hoping this interaction wasn't actually happening and it would have been forgot about.

"Hey Quinn."

Quinn looked up at the tall boy, smile on his face, and forced herself to be friendly. "Finn. What can I do for you?" Best move this along as fast as possible.

"Well I need to talk to you about what I said earlier this morning. Well, it's more of a favor." The boy seemed to be looking everywhere but at the blond girl in front of him.

"Finn I'm down here." She said, getting him to finally look her in the eye. The boy shot her an apologetic smirk. "So what is it that you want?" This conversation was starting to last a little too long for the girls patience.

"I need your help with a song. Mercedes and Tina already agreed to help but I need a third girl and I'm not going to ask Brittany because she would get Santana involved and I don't need her involved for obvious reasons." The boy rambled on looking nervous. Quinn looked less than interested in his proposition. "Look, it's a surprise for Rachel. I want to show her that I've moved on from all the stuff that's happened within the past few months. I would really appreciate your help, a lot." He was starting to become desperate.

In the beginning of Rachel and Finn's relationship, sure Quinn was pissed that the brunette had succeeded in stealing her boyfriend, but more importantly that the girl was no longer single. Of course she would never act on or pursue her feelings towards Rachel, but there was still this little flicker of hope buried deep, _deep_, inside her that no one could know about. However, as time went on, she saw how happy the dopey boy made the tiny diva and couldn't stand to try and break them up and that flicker of hope almost vanished. _Almost._ It wasn't until the boy's infidelity surfaced that that same little flicker sparked again. Quinn thought for sure Rachel would end things with Finn because she had more self respect than to have some boy do what he had done to her and get away with it; but, of course, Quinn had been yet again mistaken. Rachel treated the whole lost-my-v-card-to-your-biggest-enemy thing as if it never happened, and this made that flicker of hope turn into a flicker of, what she would call disgust, but in reality jealousy of the boy. He had no right to do what he did and have Rachel turn a blind eye, but it's not like anyone would ever stick up for her or tell her she's doing the wrong thing by taking him back.

It only got worse when Rachel admitted to Finn that she kissed Puck. No one anticipated Finn to break up with her, considering what he had done in the past to be much worse, but the boy never fails to surprise. Once it got around that they were no longer an item, Quinn seemed to perk up at this news but downplayed it as to seem like she didn't care; both for her own sanity and for appearances. She knew better than to give in to that flicker she had in the pit of her stomach.

After the Santana-Finn, Rachel-Puck fiasco, things have been more than rocky for McKinley's star couple. Rachel continued to beg and plead for Finn to take her back all during the holiday break and even when they came back. While reluctant at first, the boy finally gave into her sad cries of a second chance and they were once again an item. No one really understood why Rachel cared that much about having him back, well, the fact that she had been pining over him for the past 2 years and that she became more popular because of him might have had a slight impact on her decision. But even then it seemed to be a general consensus that she didn't deserve him and was a much better and bigger person than Finn could ever be. No one shared this opinion more than the blond cheerleader. Quinn was completely outraged that Rachel would stoop so low to get Finn back. Sure Rachel messed up by kissing Puck but Finn had done something so much worse; he had sex, lost his V card, to the one person who couldn't stand Rachel more than anyone, and then lied to her face for months about it. Some people took Finn's side with the reason that the two weren't together at the time of his scandal, but it's not like Rachel had sex with Puck, and when that was pointed out, most people just nodded and tended to side back with Rachel.

Quinn never let it show though, just how much she disagreed with Rachel's plan of action. Of course she knew that she would never hurt the diva as much as Finn has and then dump her on her ass when she makes one mistake, but just because she knew that in her mind and heart, doesn't mean that she voiced it to anyone. She just sat back and watched it all unfold, keeping her cold composure intact all while wanting to slap Rachel and shake her silly and have her realize that she was better than this stupid boy playing with her emotions. But Quinn never did, she saved it for when she would get home. Sometimes she couldn't even wait that long, she would just let her anger go as soon as she got in her car from glee rehearsal by putting in a hard rock CD and nearly yelling the lyrics out, leaving her throat raw by the time she would get home. Other times she would lay in bed listening to music telling herself not to get in the middle of it and let the couple work out their own problems. After all, she couldn't let anyone know about her true feelings towards the pathetic brunette.

Needless to say, they did work out their problems, much to Quinn's dismay. There was still some tension felt among the group, but the couple seemed to be happier than ever and it drove Quinn crazy.

"Why should I help you?" Quinn responded, squaring her shoulders to the boy.

"Why shouldn't you?" Finn shot back. He didn't mean for it to sound harsh, he was simply asking.

"After what you did to Berry you should just be happy that she's able to look in the eye. She doesn't need to be reminded what you've been through. If you say you're over it, then just let it go because it seems like she already has considering how chummy you two have been lately." The blond said with slight venom in her words, but Finn wasn't quick enough to catch it.

Finn looked a little uneasy, not expecting that response from the girl. But he shrugged it off. "I know, it's just, I need her to know that I have finally forgiven her for what she did and how much she hurt me. I need her to know that I'm okay."

Quinn was busy picking her jaw up off the floor to be sure she heard him correctly. "I'm sorry, that _you're_ okay? You have some serious issues if you think you're the one that was hurt the most. You went and slept with someone else; and not just anyone else, Santana Lopez to be exact. All she did was kiss another guy; you went and had sex with someone who wasn't her for your first time. And now you have the balls to say that you're the one who was hurt the most? That's fucked up Finn. Real fucked up. Do you even give a shit about how she feels? Have you even asked her if she's okay with what happened and how you deceived her? I bet you haven't because you're a stupid. Douchebag. Of. A. Boyfriend." She finished with hard pokes of her finger into his chest, making sure her point stuck with him. By this point she had him pinned against the locker, her glare not faltering as his eyes looked like they were going to pop out of his head. When she realized there was a crowd starting to gather, she quickly took a step back, smoothing over her cheerio uniform and taking a deep breath.

"Did you… Did you just defend Rachel? Since when do you care about her?" Finn asked after regaining his own composure.

"I don't." She lied. "I just think it's messed up, what you did to her." She said quietly.

"What about what you did to me last year? You don't think _that_ was messed up?" Finn asked, almost glaring at the girl under his nose.

_He did not just go there._ "Yeah, it was. I messed up last year but I apologized about that. I don't know what else you want me to say. I can't take back what happened. But I guess it worked out for the best for you because now you have Rachel." Without fail, she felt that familiar ping of guilt like she always did when this subject came up. She was ready to just forget what a horrible person she was last year and move on to a different side of her. That didn't stop her jealousy from rearing its ugly little head though.

"Yeah, I guess you're right about that." He said, shrugging off the subject. They were about to go their separate ways when Finn turned around, effectively stopping Quinn from her departure from this torture of a conversation. "So, are you going to help me with the song or not?"

Quinn rolled her eyes, remembering she never actually answered his question. She didn't really want to help the boy out, but she figured if she didn't help him then it might be looked upon as suspicious. "Sure. What's the song?"

"Great." Finn said, smile back on his face and handing her the sheet music. "It's a fairly familiar song so I don't think it will be hard to memorize. I'll see you later in glee."

And with that he headed down the hall in the opposite direction. Quinn took one look at the song title and huffed out a laugh. _He's doing _this_ song? You have got to be kidding me._

She was already late to lunch and hurried down to the cafeteria so she could enjoy what was left of it with her friends. She looked over to Rachel's table, which seemed to be an automatic response, to see her sitting with Kurt and Mercedes, all smiles and all Quinn wanted to do was sit in the seat next to her just to be near the girl. But no, she couldn't, and instead lifted her chin and walked to the table on the other side of the big room to where Santana and Brittany were.

"Why so late?" Santana asked mouth full of food. She and Brittany were sitting as close as humanly possible, Quinn wasn't even sure if they were using separate seats, with arms linked together. _Could they get any more adorably gross?_

"Sorry. Finn caught me at my locker and asked for a favor." Quinn replied pulling out her celery sticks and carrots along with a bottle of water. She really hated being a cheerio sometimes.

"What kind of favor?" Santana asked raising her eyebrows.

"Not _that_ kind of favor, S. Just some help with glee. He wants to surprise Rachel with a song to show him that he's over everything or whatever." Quinn tried to say as nonchalantly as she could. She didn't want to tip off Santana that it was a sore subject.

"God, they're so gross together. I can't believe she took him back after he lied to her like that." The dark haired girl said. Brittany rested her head against her girlfriends shoulder and Santana quickly kissed the top of the girls head. _I can think of another couple who might be grosser._ But then Quinn saw the utter bliss on her friends faces and immediately retracted her statement. She couldn't help but feel the anger build inside her for a second time that day at the mention of what Finn had done to the perfect little brunette.

Quinn all but growled in response muttering "tell me about it" under her breath.

"What was that?" Brittany made herself known in the conversation.

Quinn's eyes darted between her two friends. "Um, nothing. Just I think it's stupid that she took him back that easily too." She couldn't help but notice Santana's eyes narrow at her response, but the brunette decided not to press the subject.

"What song is it that he wants to sing to her? I bet it's going to be fucking laaame." Brittany elbowed the girl at her swearing and Santana ducked her head, turning towards her girlfriend and whispered her apology. Quinn did all she could to hold back a chuckle. Brittany S. Pierce had to be the only person in the history of the world who could have this sort of control over Santana Lopez, and Quinn loved being able to witness it firsthand.

"You're right. It is way lame and I'd rather not ruin the surprise by telling you right now. You're just going to have to wait until glee to find out." Quinn smiled, knowing how her dark haired friend hated surprises. Santana leaned back out of Brittany's view and mouthed "fuck you" to Quinn. She just smiled back in response, happy about the reaction.

The rest of Quinn's day was quite uneventful. Besides sitting with Santana in English, which she attempted a conversation but judging from the devious smirk and raised eyebrows, she knew something else was captivating her attention. She chanced a peak the girls phone to see Brittany's name at the top of the screen. Quinn rolled her eyes leaning back in her chair not brave enough to see what exactly they were texting each other. It wasn't until Santana asked the teacher for a bathroom break at precisely 1:30, and winked at Quinn before she stood from her seat, that Quinn knew exactly what was happening and rolled her eyes again. So for the rest of class Quinn was entertained, or not, by the ramblings between the teacher discussing some poem or short story or whatever it was, Quinn never did like English, and the incessant nagging of the girl in the front row; oh sorry, that's Rachel.

Typically Quinn didn't mind Rachel rambling during class, sometimes she even find it cute and maybe even borderline adorable, but she couldn't stop thinking about her little rant to Finn before lunch earlier today. _How could she be so stupid to not see through him and how selfish and self centered he is and dump his ass and be with me? Okay, not that last part. You really got a get a hold of yourself Fabray, you're starting to give in again and you know that can't happen. Not again. _She couldn't let her feelings get in the way of her sanity again. Even if the girls did share a close night together, which she has forced herself to not think of; she couldn't, and wouldn't, let her emotions take over.

Thankfully the end of the day came sooner than she expected and she was off to the choir room for her ridiculous performance as backup singer for Finn. As usual, the couple was sitting front and center, fingers intertwined, and Rachel's head resting on Finn's shoulder. Quinn reflexively tightened her grip on her backpack and quickened her pace to her usual seat in the corner. She was about to step up the riser when she felt a hand on her arm.

"Hey, are you ready to sing?" Finn whispered trying to not have Rachel overhear. Quinn glanced over to Rachel, who seemed to be in her own messed up world she called happiness, and simply nodded and continued to her chair.

After everyone piled into the room and took their seats, Mr. Schuester started the lesson for the day. It was nearing the end of rehearsal and Finn hadn't made one sound about the performance. Quinn was starting to think that he was chickening out when he raised his hand and announced that he had something special he wanted to say, or rather sing, to the group. He stood in the middle of the room behind a microphone and motioned for the girls to join him. Tina and Mercedes quickly made their way behind Finn, smiling at the thought of Finn performing for his girl, while Quinn could all but punch the boy in the face. She slumped her way to the microphone, trying to look as happy as she could muster (which was barely a smile) and perform the song as best as she could.

"Rachel, this is for you." He simply stated, and the girl lit up like she did when she won a solo. Quinn shifted her weight and narrowed her eyes glaring at the back of Finn's head. _Douche._

As the melody started up and the girls started singing the background vocals there were a few giggles heard around the room.

_You've got a cute way of talking  
You got the better of me  
Just snap your fingers and I'm walking  
Like a dog hanging on your leash  
I'm in a spin you know  
Shaking on a string you know_

_You make me feel like dancing_  
_I wanna dance the night away_  
_You make me feel like dancing_  
_I'm gonna dance the night away_  
_You make feel like dancing_  
_I feel like dancing, dancing, dance the night away_  
_I feel like dancing, dancing, ahhh_

_Quarter to four in the morning_  
_I ain't feeling tired no no no no no_  
_Just hold me tight and leave on the light_  
_Cause I don't want to go home_  
_You put a spell on me_  
_I'm right where you want me to be_

_You make me feel like dancing_  
_I wanna dance the night away_  
_You make me feel like dancing_  
_I'm gonna dance the night away_  
_You make feel like dancing_  
_I feel like dancing, dancing, dance the night away_  
_I feel like dancing , dancing, ahhh_

During this part of the song when it was mainly backup vocals, all three girls were swaying back and forth singing their "doo doo doo" parts, and Quinn was practically looking anywhere but at the two who were seemingly under a spotlight. All eyes in the room were on them and Quinn just didn't understand it. Did they all just forget what happened a few months ago? Were they stupid? Quinn dared to look over at Rachel and she felt her heart sink just a little more. The girl had stars in her eyes gazing up at Finn who was attempting to do what he calls "dance" in front of her, making her giggle. Quinn was having such a hard time watching the two that she wasn't even sure if she could get through the song without the urge to leave overpowering her. But by then the song had continued and, to every ones pleasure, Finn took his place behind his mic stand again.

_I'm gonna catch on fire 'cause__I wanna dance the night away  
You make me feel like dancing  
__You take me higher_

_You make me feel like dancing_  
_I'm gonna dance the night away  
I feel like dancing, dancing, dance the night away  
I feel like dancing, dancing, dance the night away  
I feel like dancing ,dancing, dance the night away  
I feel like dancing, dancing, ahhh_

_You really slipped me a potion_  
_I can't get off of the floor_  
_All this perpetual motion_  
_You gotta give me some more_  
_You gotta give me some more_  
_And if you'll let me stay  
__We'll dance our lives away_

_You make me feel like dancing I wanna dance my life away  
You make me feel like dancing I wanna dance my life away  
You make me feel like dancing I wanna dance my life away  
I feel_

_You make me feel like dancing_

Finn finished, out of breath from the high pitch of the song, and a big round of applause. It made Quinn want to gag at how Rachel bought into all this shit he was pulling. He didn't even explain that he only sang the song to her because he wanted her to know that _he_ was no longer hurt. It had nothing to do with Rachel and her feelings, but by the looks of things, the girl didn't mind. But Quinn did, she minded a hell of a lot. She really hadn't meant to let this happen but she found herself storming out of the choir room as Mr. Schuester was telling them that they were done for the day. Quinn just couldn't stand being in the same room as them anymore, she had to get out. She practically ran to her car and popped in her usual CD she listens to now on her way home and started screaming out the lyrics in hopes to calm herself, but this time it wasn't working. Normally she got the majority of her anger out during her rage session, but this time she still felt the same when she left the school as she did when she pulled into her driveway.

She killed the engine and took a few deep breaths and looked at her reflection in the rear view mirror. "Get it together Quinn. You got this. Finn's just a prick and Rachel's too wrapped up in the popularity and his dimwit charm to see it. You can't let this affect you this much. So just let it go." With one last deep breath she walked up through her front door and into her room. Her mom wasn't home yet, probably still running errands, so Quinn was left alone some more with her thoughts; which wasn't good. She put in her ear buds and let the music play while her mind started turning out more thoughts about Rachel. _How could she be so blind to not see what Finn has done to her? He's changed her, she's not who she was a year ago. I liked her better then. With her argyle animal print sweaters, knee high socks and penny loafers. And those skirts…_ Quinn's mouth turned out a smile and she raised her eyebrow at the memory. _Rachel Berry is the reason skirts were made in the first place._

Her playlist ended and she heard the bustling of pots and pans from the kitchen downstairs. Her mom was home and beginning to prepare dinner.

Quinn opened her bedroom door and yelled down to her mother, "Hey mom. How long until dinner's ready?"

"Hey honey. Um, probably 45 minutes or an hour. You should get some studying done beforehand." Judy yelled up.

Quinn shut her door and took what her mother said into consideration. Studying seemed to be the next best thing to get her mind to focus on something other than the brunette singer. So she pulled out her school books and sat down at her desk and began to read. _I will get over Rachel Berry. Even if it kills me._

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**Song: "You Make Me Feel Like Dancing" by Leo Sayer**


	4. You're Gonna Go Far, Kid

**Hello everyone! Thank you again to everyone who has story alerted this, it's quite surprising to me just how many of you are interested in this story, so thank you so much. Read and please review like always but more importantly...**

**Eeeeeenjoy!**

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It has been an hour since dinner and Quinn still couldn't stop her mind from thinking of Rachel. She was hoping light dinner conversation would do the trick, but of course her mother had nothing very interesting to say and the only thing going through Quinn's head was what she didn't dare start talking about. She was in a constant battle with herself, much like she has been for almost the past month, forcing herself to stop thinking about the small diva. As with any after dinner ritual, and it being Wednesday night, both blonds relaxed on their big couch and turned on the television, the older blond flipping it on _American Idol_. They used this time to bond, they would even pause the show after every performance and act as if they were the actual judges and either critique the singer or praise them. This night however, was different for the younger girl. She normally looked forward to their nightly television bonding, it typically took her mind off of her latest problems and that was what she was especially hoping for tonight.

As they sat watching their feature programming, the first performer took the stage. She was pretty, sure, but she was no Rachel Berry to Quinn. Quinn fought herself to not think like that, but with every attempt to rid the brunette from her mind, it was like this fire-like passion roared inside of her not allowing her to completely do away with the image of the girl. With every note the girl on the show sang, Quinn mentally compared her to how Rachel would sound; it really was no comparison. Rachel's angelic voice would easily top anyone who dared to challenge it, and no one ever did because they knew she had the winning voice. Quinn remembered fondly of Rachel's rendition of one of the diva's favorites, "Don't Rain on My Parade", and how moved she felt watching Rachel sing her little, but so very big, heart out. It wasn't until then that Quinn saw just how beautiful the singer could be while she performed, putting her heart out there for the whole audience to see. She was so caught up that she almost missed her cue if it hadn't been for the nudge she felt in her back that caused her to stumble her start out the door to the stage. Quinn had been so wrapped up in her memories that she didn't even notice that her mom had already paused the show moments ago, staring at her daughter and waiting for her input.

"Quinnie, are you okay?" Quinn snapped out of her reminiscing, turning to focus on her mother.

"What? Yeah, I'm fine. Did you like her?" she pointed to the television. Her mom smiled slightly knowing her daughters mind was on something not relevant to the show but not wanting to press the issue and slowly turned back to the TV.

"Yeah, she was all right. I'm not really a fan of the song she chose, she just kind of seemed like a cheap karaoke version, ya know? I mean it was good, but not great." Judy attempted in her best mock-judge voice. Quinn chuckled at her mother's impersonation and nodded her opinion, still staring at the TV, and her smile faded quickly, focusing back to her internal battle inside her head. "Quinnie," Judy started, squaring her shoulders to face the younger blond, "what's wrong?"

Quinn looked up at her mother, "it's nothing mom," she tried adding a reassuring smile for good measure but judging by her mother's face, Judy wasn't buying it. Quinn debated for a very brief moment just telling her mother everything and praying to the good Lord she would understand and wrap her up in a hug while telling her everything is okay. But she knew she couldn't do that, her mother was just getting over the fact that she was pregnant last year, she couldn't handle her baby possibly having the hots for another girl. She sighed as she tried to answer again. "Really mom, it's just glee club. I'm just kind of stressing about this number we're thinking about doing." She really did hate lying to her mom, but telling her the truth would just hurt her more.

"Quinn honey, I'm your mother. I know when something's wrong." Judy's voice was barely above a whisper, and Quinn felt the weight of her words as her mother cupped her hand. "I know I've been a pretty lousy mother the past year. Dealing, or rather _not_ dealing with your pregnancy and letting your father kick you out the way he did. I should have stuck up for you and done what was best for you but I was a coward and I see that now." Judy looked into her daughter's eyes with deep regret that could be felt around the room. "I'm trying to change and I feel like for the most part I have, for the better." Quinn couldn't help but nod at that statement. Things have been very good with the two blonds; they eat and share their daily events at dinner every night, they bond through television shows that they both enjoy, Judy really had taken a great deal of concern in Quinn's life since they've been reacquainted and Quinn couldn't be anything less than grateful that her mother saw the error of her ways and it was easy to give the woman a second chance. After all, she was her mother. You only really get one. Both blonds felt tears well up in their eyes, this was the first time Judy was really talking about what had happened over the last year and Quinn wasn't expecting all these emotions to come to light. At least not right now. Judy wiped a tear away with her finger before she continued. "I'm trying to be there for you now, to make up for lost time and this is the only way I know how to do it. The one thing lacking in our family before was communication and I'm trying to be better about it, if you can't see." They both chuckled before Judy turned a bit more serious. "But Quinn please, _please_ let me be there for you in the way I wasn't before."

Quinn looked at her mother's pleading eyes to finally get some _real_ insight into her daughter's life and it pained Quinn to have to keep lying, but she knew she couldn't just come right out and say it, she couldn't even come to terms with everything herself. How could she be expected to mutter words she hasn't even said in the privacy of her own room? But fighting her feelings has been getting the better of her and frankly she was tired of running. She looked down at their joined hands and quickly breathed out her response. "It's just this _person_ at school…" Quinn gave her mother a sidelong look to try and gage her reaction.

Judy sat up in her seat and Quinn noticed the sparkle in her eyes. _Oh no._ "Is it a boy? What's his name? Is it Finn? He really was such a sweet boy." Judy had been hoping Quinn would start dating again to help get over her pregnancy of last year. Her daughter was always one to have a boyfriend and her having to have gone this long without one was starting to worry her mother so the prospect of her potentially having another boy in her life was exciting to the older woman. She trusted Quinn to learn from her mistakes and for the most part, Quinn seemed as though she had moved past the pregnancy.

Quinn felt herself tense at the mention of the boy's name but she tried to make herself seem relaxed so her mother wouldn't pick up on it. She knew _now_ she couldn't say the real object of all of her recent thoughts so she just thought of some excuse. "No mom, it's not Finn. You don't know him." Quinn wanted out of this conversation as quickly as possible. She looked back up at her mother to see her still beaming with joy. She rolled her eyes and slipped her hand away from her mother's hold and started to stand up when the older blond gave her a worried look. Judy was hoping she didn't overstep. "I just forgot about some school work I need to get done before tomorrow." Quinn wasn't totally lying, studying was school work. Judy gave her a nod and Quinn made off to her room.

Once the door shut Quinn leaned back on it and slid to the floor. She didn't feel like herself anymore, all this pushing and pulling her mind was doing was really throwing her for a loop. She couldn't focus on her school studies, glee, she didn't even have the energy to punish the freshman cheerios during practice that she loved doing so much before this mind fucking started. Almost on the brink of tears from her built up frustration, it dawned on her, causing her to jerk her head up off her knees. _What's the big deal if I have feelings for Rachel? What's the worst that can happen? Obviously no one knows about it yet, or else they would have already confronted me, especially Santana, or maybe Finn. Oh who are we kidding? He could see us making out and he still wouldn't know any better than a trashcan. _Quinn noticed that burst of butterflies in her stomach and the natural curl of her lips and raise of her eyebrow at the imagery playing out in her mind. She immediately scolded herself at her body's betrayal. _You have _got_ to get a hold of yourself Fabray. You can't simply go after her now can you? So what are you going to do, just love her from afar? That sounds really creepy. No one paid attention when you stopped slushie-ing her but you can't simply announce to her that you have feelings for her. And another thing, she has that thing called a boyfriend. Remember those? You used to have them. And you know she's happy with him. _"Yeah but _I _could make her happier." Quinn heard herself mumble. _Even if you could, she's still not going to go for it. She's straight, into boys, you can't hate on her if she actually sees happiness with that dope. That's for her to deal with, not you. You should just stick to getting over her and wait for it to pass. _"It's been almost a month of fighting it and I'm not getting any closer to getting over her." _Maybe it takes longer, just stick with the plan and you'll be over her soon enough. _"Yesterday would have been soon enough."

Quinn was mentally exhausted from this back and forth her mind constantly put her through. She was ready to just give in, and had been, but whenever she did then the part of her mind that was a fighter stopped her cold reminding her of reasons she had to keep fighting. _But what's so bad about having a little crush on someone you can't have? That happens to everyone and no one's died over it. Sure you can't have her but it would do wonders to the stress you've been under lately, and it might help you to just give into your feelings and come to terms with it._ Quinn nodded in response to her thoughts. But as much as she wanted to give in there was still this pull on her brain that stopped her from completely giving in and she hated it. She hated that she couldn't just make up her mind, that her heart wanted something so badly that her mind knew she couldn't have and it was frustrating her to the point of tears. She instinctively wiped them from her eyes but instead of getting her mind onto something else, she was ready to nip this problem in the bud and let it be.

She knew she could never have Rachel, much less let anyone else in on her feelings towards her, but that didn't mean she had to internally beat herself up for it. She really wasn't doing anything wrong by having a crush, a huge one at that, on Rachel. She genuinely was happy that Rachel was happy, even if she did think she could do a better job of that. Everyone knew that Finn couldn't keep up with his girlfriend on many levels, sometimes the only thing they did have in common was the fact that both of them were in glee club and that their voices melded well together. Quinn yearned to know what the two girls shared in common, what her likes and dislikes were, pet peeves, and the works. She smiled at the thought of them sharing an evening together, maybe dinner a movie, a movie of Rachel's choosing, Quinn really wouldn't mind what movie Rachel chose, as long as they were together, maybe some light cuddling would ensue, which would lead to them being closer, and then some light kissing would turn into a heavy make out and wandering hands. Quinn shook her head, knowing she wasn't so stupid to think that would really have a chance of happening, and felt the fighting part of her mind take over. She couldn't help but feel ashamed of her feelings for the girl because they were pointless. Why have feelings for someone that you have no chance with? _I mean sure, that happens to people all the time, but they learn to get over it. Just like you need to do with Rachel. _Quinn leaned her head back against the door and closed her eyes, letting the tears to fall down her face and into her hair. She just needed to feel for a second, so many times these past few weeks she'd been pushing everything away to keep her from feeling the pain but not this time. She just needed to know what to do and how to go about her life, she was sick of being a prisoner to her own thoughts and feelings.

It always came back to the same thing, no matter how hard she fought her feelings, she still had them and they showed no signs of stopping. Quinn first went with the saying "mind over matter" and forced herself to stop thinking about Rachel time and time again, but always to no avail and her heart won out. Then she tried switching tactics and going with "the heart knows best" and "follow your heart" which caused her to give into her feelings and it felt a lot like a breath of fresh air, but it lasted for only a moment when her mind came back into play telling her to get over everything which caused the cycle to start all over again and Quinn was nearing her wits end.

But now that she really was thinking about it, she didn't see a real reason to stop thinking of Rachel the way she already was; there was no harm in it. She's had feelings for the girl for years now; it was nothing new except she had never readily admitted it like she is now and she really didn't know what to do about it. When it came to her feelings for Rachel, Quinn literally felt out of control; like she just was lost for the first time in her life and she hated it, it made her sick to not be the one in control and hold the power. She was scared to give into the power that the girl held over her and her heart but ever since her pregnancy, she learned that giving in might not be the worst thing to happen. She felt like she matured quite a bit in those nine long months, but her immature HBIC attitude came out in times of struggle, and this was definitely one of those situations where her bitchy side made itself known and her heart grew a shield around it. She had struggled all year to get her HBIC image back, but for what? Nothing had really changed; Rachel and Finn were still together, happy as ever, and since Santana was happily dating Brittany, and Quinn just not having the energy, the bullying was at an all time low. With all this realization slapping Quinn in the face, it was like her mind was finally working as a whole unit, instead of separate parts. Her feelings for Rachel wouldn't stop no matter how hard she tried, that was a sure fact, and it obviously hadn't been hurting anyone in the two years she has been crushing on the small singer.

She was coming to a painful discovery that she was finally coming to terms with. As much as she didn't want to admit, her heart was winning out and yet again she was under the brunettes thumb. She knew she was only fighting a losing a battle if she continued to fight her feelings, and she also knew giving in was the only answer to stop this whole thing. And that's what decided to do; to finally give in.

She was really hoping to be able to redeem her "perfect daughter" image with her mother, and find a respectable man to settle down with and start a small family but now she knew that would be impossible if she was to give into her heart. Slowly the tears continued to make their way down her cheeks but she made no move to wipe them away, it felt good to just feel for a change. She should probably be happy that she's going to stop this internal feud and just do what she felt was right but one song kept playing in her head.

_Tonight I'll have a look and try to find my face again  
__Buried beneath this house my spirit screams and dies again  
__Out back a monster wears a cloak of Persian leather  
__Behind the TV screen I'm fallin' to my knees_

_I said you got me where you want me again and I can't turn away  
__I'm hanging by a thread and I'm feeling like a ball  
__I'm stuck here in-between the shadows of my yesterday  
__I wanna get away, I need to get away_

_Blanket of silence makes me want to sink in deep  
__Burn all the evidence of fabricated disbelief  
__Pull back the curtains took a look into your eyes  
__My tongue has now become the platform for your lies_

_I said you got me where you want me again and I can't turn away  
__I'm hanging by a thread and I'm feeling like a ball  
__I'm stuck here in-between the shadows of my yesterday  
__I wanna get away, I need to get away_

_Now you know, yeah you got my back against the wall  
__Oh god, I ain't got no other place to hide  
__Chained down, like a sitting duck just waiting for the fall  
__You know, yeah you got my back against the wall_

_Deep in the jungle, camouflaged by all the fallen leaves  
__A hand holds up the sky while shamefully I make my plea  
__The alters calling but my legs won't seem to stand  
__Guess I'm a coward, scared to face the man I am_

_I said you got me where you want again and I can't turn away  
__I'm hanging by a thread and I'm feelings like a ball  
__I'm stuck here in-between the shadows of my yesterday  
__I wanna get away, I need to get away_

_Now you know, yeah you got my back against the wall  
__Oh god, I ain't got no other place to hide  
__Chained down, like a sitting duck just waiting for the fall  
__You know, yeah you got my back against the wall_

_Now you know, yeah you got my back against the wall  
__Oh god, I ain't got no other place to hide  
__Chained down, like a sitting duck just waiting for the fall  
__You know, yeah you got my back against the wall_

Quinn dragged herself into her bathroom to wipe her tears away and take a nice long and hot shower to help herself deal with her emotional breakdown as well as personal embrace of her decision. Things would go back to her kind of normal, admiring and did she dare say _loving_ Rachel from afar, but this time instead of scolding herself she would simply accept that that's how she views the brunette and learn to live with it. She knew it would be tough to fight the part of her that hated the fact that she had feelings for another girl, let alone Rachel Berry of all people, but she knew her heart was right and she was exhausted from going back and forth.

When she slipped into bed that night, it took her some time to finally fall asleep due to the tossing and turning from both her body and mind. Her guard was down for the first time in almost a year and she still wasn't quite sure of how to handle it yet. But once Quinn did get to sleep, she awoke feeling the most replenished she had in weeks. It was then that she was sure of what she doing and knew it was the right thing.

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**Song: "Back Against the Wall" by Cage the Elephant  
So I'm not entirely happy with how this chapter ended up but I felt like I needed to get something out there. If there's something you would be interested in seeing, I'm very open to suggestions as this story could really go anywhere at this point. Review and I'll love you. Thanks for reading everyone!**


	5. Between the Lines

**Hello everyone. I hope you are all well. Thank you to everyone who has alerted/favorited this story and an extra special thank you to everyone who has reviewed as well. They make my heart feel warm and fuzzy. We get a look at some Faberry this chapter to get things rolling in the right direction. I'm sorry for any mistakes or errors, it's 4 in the morning and I'm fighting with my computer to post this. This is also the longest chapter I've written and it was actually going to be longer but I figured it would be best to split them up, because I'm extremely tired and it just makes more sense that way. Anyways, I hope you all have a wonderful rest of the week and for those who review, your hugs are in the mail and should be delivered soon. And by the way, who else is excited to hear the duet Rachel and Quinn sing together that's coming up? I know I am! ...I really should get to bed now.**

**Ennnnnnnnnnnnjoy!**

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**Chapter 5: Between the Lines**

Quinn stood staring at the piece of paper magnetized to her refrigerator with a nervous feeling in her gut memorizing the words typed out on the red invitation decorated with pink and white balloons and different sized hearts along the margin: _Valentine's Day Party _written in professional script font on the top line followed by the time, date, and place including an RSVP number. The Berry's have always been known for their holiday themed parties, they seriously have a party for _any_ holiday, even ones they don't celebrate. Typically her mother never attended the family's get-togethers due to either work, she claims the weekend is when she gets her best work done, or her going out of town, but since she had done most of her work the previous week, Judy figured it best to go to one and see how she liked it. It was then that Quinn heard footsteps leading into the kitchen.

"Good morning sweetheart. You're up early for a Saturday, aren't you?" Judy asked turning on the water in the sink to wash dishes.

Quinn looked at the stove clock, _10:37. _"I guess, but Mom do I _really_ have to go to this thing?" She asked pointing to the invitation.

Judy turned around to see what she was referring to and quickly turned back to the dishes. "Yes honey, I already told them that I would be bringing a guest and that's you." She could hear the disapproving look on her daughters face. "Oh come on Quinnie, we'll have fun. I've never been to one of their parties and I've always wanted to and since I have my work already done for the weekend and Susan being busy with her family, it's the perfect opportunity to see what all the fuss is all about." Judy and her sister Susan were _extremely _close, and with them being a mere 15 months apart, it wasn't hard to see why.

"You always throw out their invitations." Quinn deadpanned.

"Well… I'm not this time. We're going Quinn Fabray and that is that." Quinn leaned her back into the refrigerator door hard and crossed her arms; her mother didn't seem to notice. "And besides, isn't their daughter in your little glee club at school? Rachel, right? I'm sure she'll be there and you can hang out with her so you're not stuck with the old, boring adults." Judy tried her best to tease Quinn, but the younger blonde was having none of it.

This was the one thing Quinn was worried about; seeing Rachel. Having to be around her all night and probably being forced to actually talk to her. How could she be expected to hold a conversation when every time she sees the brunette her mouth runs dry and her mind blanks? There's no way she could go a whole night being in her presence. It would just be torture, not to mention a bit awkward if Rachel confronted her about her strange behavior. The past few days had been hard enough on Quinn not paying the diva any extra attention, which was hard during the school day and she still found herself not glaring but instead almost gazing at Rachel during classes as the girl answered the teacher more intelligently than half the class could understand. Rachel must have felt the blonde staring at her because on more than one occasion she had glanced back to meet Quinn's eyes and acting on instinct, Quinn suddenly looked at the front of the room pretending she wasn't just admiring her meticulous and quite adorable ramble of an answer. However there was one occasion where Quinn did let her eyes linger on those intense brown orbs, it was like Rachel wanted her to be looking at her and Quinn felt her heart jump to her throat and her breath hitch but kept her eyes locked on the diva and watched, as if in slow motion, her throw her gorgeous brown locks over her shoulder and gave Quinn the most subtle, almost sexy, smirk the blond had ever seen. And just as fast as it happened, it was over and Quinn had to jerk her head back in astonishment and disbelief, this thing with Rachel was starting to get out of hand. Now she was delusional.

It had only gotten worse in glee when people were asked to perform their "love song selection" in front of the class. Quinn had forgotten all about the assignment and she debated just making something up last minute but being in the state she was in, which was raging jealousy from seeing the star couple perform "Don't Go Breakin' My Heart", her heart really wasn't in the singing-love-songs spirit so she was hoping to just be skipped out on.

Artie had a very gutsy performance of Michael Jackson's "P.Y.T.", to which Santana almost ripped his head off if it hadn't been for literally everyone holding her back and thankfully he wheeled out of the choir room and left for the day to avoid losing use of anymore of his body parts. Of course once the dust was settled Brittany leaned into her girlfriend and whispered, "Well it _was_ a good song." Santana just rolled her eyes and took her girlfriends hand in hers again.

It was no secret that Artie was always after the tall blonde cheerleader, even after she and Santana were official. But try as he might, which was surprisingly hard, she never gave him the time of day. Plus Santana threatened him daily which halted what little, or no, progress he made with Brittany.

Puck performed an offending version of Queen's "Fat Bottomed Girls" to his what-the-hell-is-he-thinking crush Lauren; she wasn't impressed, which kind of surprised people, but no one really cared enough to discuss it further. Since Lauren was new to the club, she wasn't expected to sing. So she didn't.

Santana performed a duet with Brittany to the tune of the very sweet and innocent, two things Santana is not which is why everyone knew Brittany suggested it, Barry Louis Polisar's "All I Want is You" with Santana even playing the harmonica, which Quinn later found out she learned exclusively for the song to make her girlfriend happy. Needless to say everyone awed once they were finished with Brittany having a beaming smile on her face, and even Santana had a slight smirk and twinkle in her eye once they sat back down and joined hands with the blonde's head resting on her girlfriends shoulder. Everyone knew Santana was tough as a cupcake when it came to her counterpart and thought it was very endearing of her to agree to do such a loving song with the girl of her dreams.

Tina and Mike did a sing-and-dance number, obviously with Tina singing and Mike dancing. Quinn couldn't remember what number they did though, but it was some love song.

Sam, the kid Quinn couldn't stand the most because he always gave her googly eyes, sang Justin Beiber's "Baby" while attempting to gaze into her eyes through the whole thing. Everyone in glee knew he was trying to get a good starting reputation around the school so no wonder he would go after the head cheerleader. Only he thought since he was a big football star, then he would be a shoe in. Little did he know, Quinn only had eyes for one person; that person being, of course, a _girl_. During the performance she thought her eyes were going to stick to the top of her head from rolling them so much while seeing the boy _dance? _She didn't know what movements he was doing on that floor, but it sure as hell wasn't any step she was familiar with. But alas, the boy sat down back in his seat when the song was finished, glancing back at Quinn with a wink. Quinn almost felt herself gag.

Having Kurt back in New Directions was a very refreshing breath; it felt like they were whole again. And having Blaine there to support his newly found boyfriend was very refreshing for Kurt. The bullying being at an all time low, and from the countless amounts of begs and pleads from really everyone in the club, Kurt decided to come back after Christmas and somehow convinced Blaine to come along too. They sang an acapella version of Paul McCartney's "Silly Love Songs", it really did sound phenomenal. They were a highly respected couple around glee club since unlike most couples, they detested public displays of affection and never kiss and tell so when they took their seats again, that were slightly pushed together, they just smiled and nodded briefly to each other which caused everyone to have a loving smile cross their lips.

Mercedes was the next to perform, and hopefully the last according to Quinn. She sang one of Alicia Keys' classics, "Fallin'", and with it being such a well known song, everyone was on their feet dancing and singing along by the end. It was a nice transition from all of the sappiness going around the room.

"Okay, last but not least we have Quinn" Mr. Schuester stated. Everyone turned in their seats to face the blonde, waiting for her to take her position in front of the group. Wide eyed, her vision bounced off everyone else's, linger on Rachel for little bit longer than necessary, before confessing that she hadn't thought of any song for the assignment. "Well nonsense, I'm sure you can think of one off the top of your head and the band knows just about everything." He gestured to them with all of them slowly nodding their heads in agreement. Sometimes Quinn wondered if she had ever heard one of them speak.

Defeated, she rose from her chair with thoughts of different songs racing through her mind before she got to the piano, still trying to think of a song, _any_ song, to sing. She glanced back around the room at her peers and fellow glee mates before resting her eyes on a particular brunette sitting in the front row. She tried to think of a song that would please Rachel and make her happy, maybe even impress her, but she was coming up empty. It wasn't until she glanced a little farther down the brunette's right arm that she zoned in like tunnel vision seeing _his_ hand joined with hers and she felt that familiar rise of jealousy start rumbling in her stomach. She knew exactly what song she wanted to sing. She stood at the piano bench and politely requested to Brad the song she wanted. She then pulled up a stool behind the microphone stand and lowered it to a comfortable position. She looked over at the piano man and gave him a nod to signal him to start playing. She closed her eyes and let the harmony take her over, swinging her upper body back and forth with the heel of her foot tapping out the beat.

_When the rain is blowing in your face  
__And the whole world is on your case  
__I could offer you a warm embrace  
__To make you feel my love_

_When the evening shadows and the stars appear  
__And there is no one there to dry your tears  
__I could hold you for a million years  
__To make you feel my love_

_I know you haven't made your mind up yet  
__But I will never do you wrong  
__I've known it from the moment that we met  
__No doubt in my mind where you belong_

_I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blue  
__I'd go crawling down the avenue  
__No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do  
__To make you feel my love_

Everyone around the room was swaying to the beat by the point the strings joined in. Quinn slowly opened her eyes to look around at the other couples with arms around each other and lazily staring into each other's eyes and even Mr. Schuester had a small twinkle thinking of the person he cared for, more than likely Mrs. Pillsberry, now known as Howell. Quinn trailed her eyes down to see Rachel with stars in her eyes looking back at her and her hand resting in her lap, not accompanied by Finn's. Her boyfriend had his bottom lip slightly poked out and Quinn felt a smile creep up on her lips as she closed her eyes again to finish the rest of the song.

_The storms are raging on the rolling sea  
__And on the highway of regret  
__Though the winds of change are blowing wild and free  
__You ain't seen nothing like me yet_

_I could make you happy, make your dreams come true  
__Nothing that I wouldn't do  
__Go to the ends of the earth for you  
__To make you feel my love_

_To make you feel my love_

Quinn was welcomed back to reality with a big round of applause from all of her peers, and a darling Rachel standing from her seat clapping very enthusiastically. Quinn felt her cheeks start to burn as a blush crept up her neck onto her face and she bowed her head with a shy smile. Rachel always made her feel nervous and this was the most the girl had ever paid attention to Quinn, especially in glee. Needless to say, Quinn was extremely satisfied with both her selection and her execution.

"Quinn, that was simply magnificent!" Rachel exclaimed as the room began to quiet down. Quinn noticed the nods around the room. Now she knew how Rachel felt to have everyone's eyes on hers, and she could see how it could be addictive.

"Really Quinn that was just… wonderful. Thank you for that." Mr. Schuester congratulated her once more and asked her to her seat as he moved the stool back to its original position beside the piano. "All right guys, I'd say that was a very successful Valentine's Day Tribute so congratulations to you all on a job well done. Now have a good weekend and I'll see you all next week."

Everyone gathered their things, excited about getting their weekend started and spending it with their significant others. Quinn watched as Rachel and Finn joined hands again, walking together out of the room, but not without Rachel glancing back over her shoulder directly at Quinn. Quinn felt her heart skip a little.

"Hey Q, you going to Puck's party tomorrow night? You know it'll be a good one." Santana and Brittany walked over to their friend with linked pinkies, Quinn saw this and smiled.

"No can do, my mom's making go to Berry's dad's party tomorrow night." Quinn responded sounding a little more excited than she probably should have.

"Isn't that for like, old people?" the tall blonde asked.

"Typically yes, but since my mom doesn't have anyone to go with, and she doesn't have any work to do, then I have to go with her."

"What are you going to do all night? Just sit and talk to all the parents or something? I'm sure Berry will be there, unless Finn drags her to Puck's party." Santana thought out loud. Quinn felt her stomach drop. She was kind of looking forward to spending the evening with Rachel now that she thought more about it. It never crossed her mind that she would actually end up going to Puck's party, but now it did seem like a more probable possibility. Finn was always dragging her out to those parties, even though she never had fun.

It was Saturday night and Quinn and Judy stood outside the Berry residence, Judy wearing a knee length pencil skirt and red blouse with ruffles around the collar trailing down the buttons in the middle and black pumps, and Quinn wearing a simple black dress with similar shoes. Santana had texted Quinn multiple times begging her to show up at Puck's saying it just wouldn't be the same without her but Quinn would have to argue that considering the time's she chose to drink resulted in her getting pregnant and the second time with her bitching at Puck about getting her pregnant, she had been quite ashamed of her behavior. There was another time she was pretty tipsy, but she refused to think too much about that. Quinn replied with an apology and saying she simply couldn't get out of going with her mom to the party. Little did the Latina know, Quinn was jittery the whole time getting dressed. She even debated what to wear and then remembered that she had to come across like she didn't want to be there in the first place and would much rather be at Puck's with all of her other friends. Of course this was still assuming the tiny singer would even be at her home and Finn wouldn't force her to go with him.

A short, balding man with thick black rimmed glasses greeted both women at the door with a bright smile. _So that's where Rachel gets it._

"Welcome Judy and Quinn. I'm Hiram Berry, my husband Ben is somewhere around the house mingling. Anyway, welcome to our home." He opened the door wider and waved the two into the house handing Judy a glass of champagne. Quinn heard light music playing from their surround sound speakers and looked around at the décor and balloons tied to nearly every sturdy surface of the house. The house had a very homey and comfortable feel to it that made Quinn feel instantly relaxed, the smell wafting around reminded her Rachel and fluttered her eyes closed and took a long breath in, feeling herself relax a little more. "Judy, I don't think I've ever seen you here before at previous parties. We're very glad you made it to this one."

"Yes, well I do apologize for that. I'm always working over the weekend but fortunately I finished my work earlier in the week and plus your parties have created quite a buzz around this small town and I needed to see what all the talk was about. I'm just sorry it took me this long to come."

He waved off her apology. "It's nothing to be sorry about Judy, really, we're just happy you're here now." _Wow can this man get any more genuine? _He turned to focus on Quinn, "I'm assuming you don't want to hang out with all of us old farts" Quinn lightly chuckled and shook her head, "Rachel is in her room if you want to go see what she's up to."

Quinn furrowed her brows. "She's here?"

"Well yes, where else would she be?"

"I just didn't know if she would be with Finn at Puck's party or down here talking with all the other guests."

"No, I think she and Finn got into an argument or something because she normally _would_ be down here with all of us, but she hasn't come out of her room all day except to grab a quick bite to eat. Maybe company would do her some good." Quinn subtly nodded her head. "The room is the first one on your right when you get up the stairs."

Quinn looked at her mother for her approval to leave her side, which she immediately granted, and Quinn smiled before ascending the stairs. She was walking down the narrow hallway when she heard a deep bass that was coming out of the room she indicated as Rachel's. She recognized the song, realizing Rachel was already well into it, and leaned against the wall next to the door that was cracked open and heard Rachel singing along.

_Will he, will he still remember me?_  
_Will he still love me even when he's free?_  
_Or will he go back to the place where he will choose the poison over me?_  
_When we spoke yesterday_  
_He said to hold my breath and sit and wait_  
_I'll be home so soon, I won't be late_

_He won't go_  
_He can't do it on his own_  
_If this ain't love, then what is?_  
_He's willing to take the risk_  
_So I won't go_  
_He can't do it on his own_  
_If this ain't love, then what is?_  
_I'm willing to take the risk_

_'Cause he won't go_  
_He can't do it on his own_  
_If this ain't love, then what is?_  
_We're willing to take the risk_  
_I won't go_  
_I can't do it on my own_  
_If this ain't love, then what is?_  
_I'm willing to take the risk_

Quinn, knowing the song well, was outside Rachel's door contemplating why she was listening to such a depressing song. _She probably just likes the song weirdo._ Quinn realized how obvious that was until she heard a sniffle come from Rachel's room wondering what was going on in that head of hers. _Why don't you stop being a creepy stalker chick and go find out? _She shook her head and looked across the hall at what was the bathroom and grabbed a few tissues.

"Rachel?" She asked softly slowly tapping on the door effectively pushing it further open.

The girl spun around in her computer chair, caught totally off guard by the familiar voice, wiping stray tears away from her eyes. "Qu-Quinn? What are you doing here?" Her eyes were blood-shot as she kept trying to keep the tears at bay while in the presence of what used to be her nemesis.

Things have calmed down considerably between the two since Quinn stopped giving her a hard time. They weren't friends by any means, but they weren't at each other's throats either. Rachel sniffled again and Quinn's heart broke for the brunette and at the same time she wanted to murder whoever it was who made her feel this horrible. But she also felt a tingle run through her seeing Rachel with her hair in a messy bun, a wife beater (to which Quinn noticed was not accompanied by a bra), and black booty shorts. Maybe Rachel considered these her "chill clothes", but it was something entirely different to Quinn.

"Hey. I had to come with my mom to the party your dad's are having downstairs. One of your dads suggested I come up and see you since I guess you haven't been yourself today." Quinn took a few steps into her room, seeing trophies lining every shelf in her room along with a few plaques hanging on the walls. Other than that, all Quinn noticed was _pink_. Pink walls, pink bedspread, pink computer with a black desk with a small black chair, even pink picture frames with a few of her and Finn, and New Directions after they had won Sectionals both years and another one of their last day of school. Quinn smiled at the memory.

"Oh. I'm sorry you have to see me in this condition. Excuse me." She turned her chair away obviously trying to get a hold of her emotions before attempting a conversation with the blonde.

"Here." Quinn offered the tissues in her hand. Rachel turned and gave a sheepish smile at Quinn before gladly accepting them with a whisper of a thank you as she politely dotted her eyes and dried her nose. "What's going on? I heard the song you were singing. Is it Finn?" Quinn didn't want to intrude too much in the brunette's personal life but she couldn't stop this feeling of needing to know what had her so upset.

Rachel looked up at Quinn with scrunched brows. "What do you care if it is or not?"

_Shit. _"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked, it's not my place." Quinn looked down at the floor and started fiddling with her fingers. This was the start of an awkward night.

"Allow me to apologize Quinn. You're only asking a question." Quinn raised her eyes, keeping her head parallel to the floor, and quirked an eyebrow. "While I wouldn't classify us as _friends_ exactly, I wouldn't call us enemies either and with that comes a level of trust. And maybe you could understand since you were also with him in a romantic way." Quinn lifted her head up, not knowing where this was going. "To answer your question, yes it is about Finn. We seemed to have had a disagreement earlier today and as you can see it has taken its toll on me emotionally. You can sit down, you know." Rachel motioned to her bed and Quinn took a seat.

Thinking Rachel was going to continue, Quinn stayed quiet and studied Rachel's form. She was staring off into space with a hard look on her face, more than likely reliving the argument. The silence was stretching into an uncomfortable one and Quinn decided to press a little further.

"You want to talk to me about it? I can be a good listener." Quinn offered with a small smile.

Rachel huffed out a laugh. "I'm sure that's what you want to hear about all night. My boy problems with the one I stole from you last year."

"Rachel, I don't care that you two are together. Last year was a long time ago. I've gotten over it by now." Rachel nodded her understanding, her sadness written clearly on her face. "But I thought you were happy with him. I mean after Christmas break and you got back together it seems like everything's been fine. Singing duet after duet, he even sang that song for you in glee." _A song that was all about him and not at all about you. _Quinn felt that very familiar sting of jealousy in the pit of her heart. She took a deep breath, remembering this was about Rachel. Not her.

"I was happy." Again Quinn raised her eyebrow and gave her a questionable look. "I mean, I'm happy now too but not as happy as I used to be. And today just kind of added to that." Rachel added almost silently. Quinn gave her a sad look, not knowing exactly what to say. This is not how Quinn expected to spend her night with Rachel. She'd never seen Rachel look so devastated and almost broken, it was a far cry to the usual excited and exuberant Rachel Berry she displayed in front of everyone else.

"Look," Quinn began, "I know I'm probably one of the last people you would like to talk to about this but I know how Finn can be and maybe it will help if you just talk it out. You know, get some of the weight off your mind."

Rachel stood from her chair and Quinn started to panic thinking she was going to ask her to leave or that it wasn't any of her business and start throwing their past in her face. She let out a breath as Rachel sat down next to her, only to have it hitch again when their hands lightly grazed. "Sorry." Rachel quickly apologized and scoot further away. Quinn kicked herself telling her emotions to get a hold of themselves.

"You're right." Rachel responded, lifting Quinn's hopes. "You are the last person I would want to talk to about this." And down they went. "But you're also right that I should talk this out, get the weight off as you said." Quinn slowly nodded waiting for more elaboration. "Why did you help Finn that day? He told me you guys got into some sort of argument before lunch or something."

"Um, yeah, we did." Quinn said awkwardly scratching an invisible itch on the back of her neck but not wanting to tell Rachel the real reason they were fighting was because he was making the situation about himself when she felt he should focus on his girlfriend and her feelings. She couldn't break Rachel's heart more than it already obviously was. Quinn looked up at Rachel hoping she wasn't expecting an explanation but from the look on Rachel's face, she was. "I just didn't really like the song he was doing and thought you would have preferred something else. Something more meaningful I guess."

"And what song would you have chosen?" Rachel asked without missing a beat.

"Adele's _One and Only_." Quinn blurted out without hesitation. She had listened to that song over and over again with only Rachel on her mind. She looked at Rachel in the corner of her eye seeing if she caught on to her immediate answer. When she couldn't tell her reaction she turned her head a little more to see Rachel giving her an almost bashful half smile and bowed her head away from the blonde. Quinn felt confused by her reaction, but chalked it up to her agreeing that it was a better song than the one her boyfriend sang and couldn't help but smile from the adorableness that was Rachel Berry.

When her smile faded, Rachel looked back up to Quinn's eyes. "Finn said you didn't agree with the reason he was singing it." _Busted. _Quinn was doing everything she could to keep a straight face and not give away that she was caught. "It's okay, Quinn, he told me everything and I agree with your opinion." Quinn locked eyes with Rachel and figured that that was what the argument was about between her and her boyfriend. Rachel lowered her head and pulled her knees to her chest and pushed herself up against her pillows propped up by the headboard.

"That was what the fight was about?" Quinn prodded a little more.

Rachel nodded, tears welling again in her eyes but wiping them away quickly with her tissue. "Yes. He told me that he wanted me to know that he was okay with what happened between Puck and I. I tried to explain to him that I didn't have feelings for Puck when I did what I did, it was just to get back at him for doing what he did with Santana." Quinn felt like bobble head with how many times she was nodding her head as Rachel talked. She noticed Rachel contort her face from sad and helpless to what looked like furious in a split second and looked Quinn square in the eye, which caused the blonde's eyes to widen and take full attention. "Can you believe that? He wanted to make sure that _I_ knew _he_ was okay! Like what he did to me wasn't even a big deal!" Rachel balled her fists up looking down at her comforter and Quinn could see what a hard time she was having with her emotional build up.

Quinn leaned in using her arm to hold her weight and whispered, "Try to walk it off, Rach." Rachel looked up to Quinn, taking in the close proximity of the blonde, raking her eyes up and down Quinn's lean body catching just the bit of cleavage she could see due to the opening her position allowed, and Quinn could have sworn she saw Rachel's pupils dilate the smallest of amounts. Quinn narrowed her eyes a bit trying to see if she saw what she thinks she did. Rachel flew off the bed and started pacing the floor in front of Quinn before she could be entirely sure.

"I told him I didn't think it was fair of him to ignore my feelings and that he needed to focus on me considering what he did was much worse but of course he just didn't seem to see my side." Rachel continued her rant and Quinn sat back up watching the girl ping pong between the walls before she stopped and whispered something so soft that if it wasn't for the close attention Quinn was paying to Rachel she wouldn't have heard it. "Sometimes I wonder why I tried so hard to get him back." Rachel quickly shook her head a couple of times before continuing her pacing. "My heart is still bruised from what he did. You know something?" Rachel stopped right in front Quinn, who wasn't sure if Rachel was looking for an answer so she just slightly shook her head. "He never once apologized to me about." Quinn felt her jaw go slack. She was sure at some point Finn would have at least given his girlfriend a simple apology. Rachel shook her head frantically back and forth. "Nope. Not once. Not one 'I'm sorry Rachel for sleeping for someone else and losing my virginity to them when it was kind of an unsaid promise that we would be each other's firsts, and then lying to you about it months.' Not one _fucking_ I'm sorry. Not one ounce of visible remorse. How could I be so stupid, Quinn? Why did I try so hard to get him back just for him to cut me down like this?" Quinn could literally see Rachel's delicate heart breaking and just wanted to tell Rachel that _she_ could be the one to put it all back together and would never hurt her like she's been hurt before. Knowing that wasn't an option, she just sat frozen in place.

Rachel looked down at the floor feeling the heartbreak taking over again before Quinn finally realized she needed to say something. "You're not stupid, Rachel. You're one of the smartest, kindest, most caring, and loving person I know." Rachel gave Quinn a sidelong look. That was the nicest thing Rachel had ever heard the Cheerio say to her before and Quinn knew this too and they both shared a smile, knowing that they were starting some sort of friendship. "You love him don't you?" Quinn tried getting back on track.

Rachel let out a big sigh and nodded her head. "Of course I do. I wouldn't have been with him for this long if I didn't." Quinn felt her heart drop a little at the confession and hung her head. "I just don't know if he appreciates me and that's what frustrates me the most. I feel like I do everything for him and do anything I can to make him happy and from that he expects the world from me. All I expect in return is a little attention and a simple apology for his wrong doings. Is that too much to ask?"

Quinn shook her head, "Of course it's not. He should be the one doing everything for you. You're just too good for him Rachel." Rachel looked at her expectantly and took a seat on her bed next to the blonde. "But you guys make it seem like you're so much in love. You mean to tell me that that's a lie now?"

"Adele fan, are you?" Quinn simply nodded, utterly confused at the instant change in topic. "That was a brilliant performance you did in glee today. It was a nice change to have something so intimate in contrast to all the sweet and lovey dovey songs people were singing."

"I thought you would love that kind of thing." Quinn said with a smile.

"I do. I love romance, anyone would know that about me. But it was just a nice change of pace and good note to end on."

"So what does this have to do with Finn?" Quinn wanted to get to the bottom of this.

"Well before you came in, I was singing a song."

"Adele's 'He Won't Go.'" Quinn answered. "It's about this couple who's together but they're not exactly in love but they care about each other enough to stay together because they figure what they have is better than nothing and they don't want to hurt the other by walking away."

Rachel smiled, impressed at Quinn's knowledge of music. "Yes. Singing is my way of expression." This was common sense for anyone who simply knew Rachel's name. "It helps me get over my troubles and calms the beast in my head, if you will." Quinn lightly laughed, knowing she does the same thing. "When we have to put on a performance in glee then typically I'll choose the most loving song to show everyone that we're still good together and also because we have great chemistry when we perform. But with everything that happened between Finn and I today then that song summed up how I felt about the situation. This man, or _boy_, whom I love deeply doesn't really seem to care that much about me, and I think he knows that too. He acts as if he's doing me a favor by dating me, but neither one of us wants to fully let go knowing what we had in the past and hoping that somehow we'll get that back soon. So we just keep staying together and trying harder to understand one another."

"There's not much to understand with him." Quinn muttered.

"While you may be correct in that aspect, he promised to try and get to know me better and treat me differently and act like the boy I fell in love with last year and made me happy." The sadness was starting to show through Rachel yet again. Quinn was having a hard time controlling herself and not confessing everything in her heart right then and there. "I'll be right back. I have to use the ladies room." Quinn held in a laugh at the girl feeling the need to explain where she was going but she nodded and watched Rachel exit the room. She felt her eyes subconsciously drift down her back and rest on the girl's ass. As if on instinct, her eyebrow raised.

Once she heard the bathroom door click shut, Quinn let out a deep breath. She couldn't believe how stupid Finn was for treating Rachel like dirt, again, but just how affected Rachel was with it all. Quinn always kind of thought Rachel to be stronger, that if she felt someone was taking advantage of her, or bringing her down then she wouldn't stick around and know that there was somebody better out there for her. But that was the old Rachel, the pre-Finn Rachel. Now all Rachel did was make sure he was happy no matter how he treated her. And now Quinn knew exactly how deep that went and she didn't like it at all. Maybe she would have a little talk with Finn later. Anything to make Rachel happy.

Rachel splashed cool water on her face and stared at her reflection in her bathroom mirror letting the water drip off. This Finn thing had taken a toll on her and she knew she wasn't herself anymore. She knew she was being stubborn by staying with him but what they had in the past was real to Rachel. Finn was a good guy, when he wanted to be. But Rachel would give this relationship another chance and hope for the best. She did love him after all, and that meant something. Right?

When Quinn heard the bathroom door open, she straightened her back and smiled back at Rachel as she entered the room.

"Do you want a change of clothes?" Rachel asked, noticing Quinn hadn't really seemed relaxed since she stepped into her room earlier tonight.

"Um, I guess? I mean it's really not a big deal. The party will probably be over soon, right?" Quinn was dying to get out of that dress.

Rachel looked over at her alarm clock. _10:24. _"I doubt it. Their parties can go on until the wee hours of the morning."

Quinn smirked, hoping she would be spending that much more time with Rachel. "Then I guess a change of clothes is in order."

Rachel threw Quinn some sweatpants and a t-shirt and Quinn made her way to the bathroom to change. When Quinn got back to Rachel's room, the girl was lying down and watching TV. Rachel noticed Quinn enter and scoot over to give the blonde room to lie down beside her. Quinn put her neatly folded dress on Rachel's dresser and placed her shoes by her door. She hesitantly laid down next to Rachel, careful not to get too close and have skin to skin contact. She couldn't handle that. Especially with what happened last time they were this close. Images of that night kept flooding Quinn's mind. Having Rachel that close to her with that level of intimacy. She was sure the brunette never shared that level of passion and desire with Finn. The two had never spoken of that night before and Rachel always acted as if it never happened, so after a while Quinn did too. But they were making progress tonight. Rachel had opened up to her in the same way she had the night that took place months ago. Quinn wasn't even sure if Rachel remembered, they were both kind of drunk, but she had to know. And if Rachel did remember, they needed to talk about it. Everything needed to be aired out in the open.

Quinn ventured a glance in Rachel's direction to see her eyes glued to the television set. She turned her head back and stared at the ceiling. Her heart was pounding so loud she was afraid Rachel would hear it in anticipation of the answer to a simple question. But it was now or never.

"Rachel?" Quinn asked getting Rachel to turn her head and hum out that she had her attention. It was then that Quinn rolled her head to meet brown eyes that Quinn swore she could get lost in. "Do you remember that night at Puck's party?"

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**Songs: Adele "Make You Feel My Love" and "He Won't Go"**


	6. A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little

**Hello everyone! Here we have chapta 6. I was quite overwhelmed with the response of my last update and cranked this baby out as soon as I could. Thank you all again for reviewing, alerting, favoriting, just...everything. Thank you so much. So remember in the first chapter I said that the girls spend a night together? Well here we see just what happened. I kind of struggled putting the end of this chapter together and fought with myself and changed it around, so I figured I might as well just post it and see what you guys think and go from there. I hope you are well and if you haven't gotten your hugs in the mail yet then I suggest you talk to your mail carrier because they should be there by now.  
**

**Ennnnnnnnjoy!**

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**Chapter 6: A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More "Touch Me"**

_It was a Saturday night and music was bumping out from Puck's very expensive sound system in the basement of his house. Everyone, for the most part, was already well passed buzzed and still gulping down drinks. Quinn, while starting out with simple wine coolers, was convinced by Santana to switch to the real alcohol and let her steal some of her vodka and mixed it with Coke Zero. She was already on her third cup by the time she, Santana, and Brittany were loudly chatting about being a Cheerio and how rewarding it was for their figure and discussing new routines that they had no chance of remembering the next morning._

_Puck and Finn were busy playing Mike and Tina at beer pong and clearly winning. Tina wasn't sure if she had even sunk a cup yet and the game was already almost over._

_Kurt, Mercedes, and Blaine were sitting on the couch talking about Kurt's experience over at Dalton Academy. Kurt and Mercedes have always been close ever since Glee started and they instantly hit it off. And Blaine added to their group with no resistance. The three had become some sort of trio, similar to the unholy trinity of Quinn, Santana, and Brittany. Mercedes and Blaine had a red plastic cup in their hands, nearly empty, laughing hysterically at a joke that Kurt had made while Kurt was completely sober. Someone had to be the designated driver of the night and he had no problem filling that role. He loved that Blaine easily blended in with his friends from McKinley High and that he was able to hang out with all of his friends together instead of living some sort of double life._

_Unfortunately, Artie had to go visit some of his family members that weekend so he wasn't there._

_Rachel was busy watching her boyfriend playing beer pong with their friends with her first full cup of the night still in her hand. Finn had mixed it for her when they had first gotten there and she had been sipping it off and on since. It was a little strong for her liking, since she never wanted to drink in the first place, and realizing that besides Mercedes and Blaine, no one had a designated driver. Puck had mentioned that they could all stay the night there if they needed to, seeing as his parents were out of town and there was plenty of space for everyone, or if worse came to worse they could all pitch in for a taxi or two to drive them home. Rachel wasn't very keen or either idea and figured it best to stay as sober as possible. This was easy considering she detested the taste of alcohol to begin with but to make Finn happy, she pretended to be enjoying it anyway._

"_Rach, is that still your first drink?" Finn asked as he took his place by her side after the game had ended._

_Rachel's body stiffened hoping he wouldn't have noticed. "Yes it is." She wasn't going to lie to the boy. Finn gave her a confused look. "It's a little strong. And considering Kurt is the only one sober, but simply can't drive everyone back home, then I figured it smart for me to keep a clear mind for when we needed to leave and go home."_

"_Puck said we could just stay here tonight. I already called dibs on his parents room for us." Finn attempted to string in a hint to Rachel, which Rachel definitely caught onto but it didn't stop her from being surprised that he was being so blunt about it._

"_Excuse me?" She asked making sure they were on the same page with his comment._

_He bumped her shoulder in what he claimed to be a flirtatious way when in actuality it just caused Rachel to stumble a step backwards and rub her shoulder to ease the pain. "C'mon Rach. We'll have the whole bed to ourselves to do whatever we want."Finn replied with a wiggle of his bushy eyebrows. Instead of be excited at the prospect of sharing a night of intimacy with the boy she had been wanting to call her boyfriend for over a year, she couldn't help but feel almost violated and disgusted at him thinking it would be that easy._

"_I don't think so Finn. We should probably just go home." She didn't exactly mind sharing a bed to sleep in with Finn as long as all they did was sleep. But now that she knew what his intentions were, she just wanted to go home and sleep in her own bed, alone. She didn't want to start an argument in front of the group and saw the affect the alcohol was having on the boy in front of her and knew better than to try and have an intelligent conversation about what was wrong with his approach._

_Finn took a step back from his girlfriend, anger starting to show through his eyes. "I want to spend the night with my girlfriend, Rachel. Is that so much to ask?" Finn's voice grew louder and Rachel looked around and saw people were starting to glance in their direction._

"_Finn, we can talk about this later." Rachel whispered harshly trying her hardest to calm the boy down and placing her hand on his forearm hoping to gain the control in this situation._

_He yanked his arm away from her, as if she burnt him. "No, Rachel. We'll talk about his now!" He moved closer to her until he was towering over the brunette and she noticed the room grow silent and felt all the stares in their direction and looked down at the floor in embarrassment. It wasn't the first time he's caused a scene like this but it never took away the uneasiness that it caused Rachel to feel knowing that they were on display yet again._

_Along with everyone else in the room, Quinn stopped talking and focused on what was happening with the star couple. She narrowed her eyes at the boy raising his voice to the small brunette and stood up taking hesitant steps towards the two. Puck saw her advancing and also took a step forward ready to take Finn into another room if it started to get more out of control. Rachel had a way of putting Finn back in his place and everyone was on the edge of their seats to see if she would or if her boyfriend would make a fool of himself in front of them._

_Santana took Quinn's wrist in her hand gently pulling her down to her level. When Quinn looked back at her Latina friend she saw the warning look in her eyes. "Don't," whispered Santana. She knew that her friend and Rachel had some sort of friendship, as light as it was, but didn't exactly like it. Quinn, Santana, and Brittany had ruled the school in their first two years up until Quinn got knocked up and lost Finn to the diva. Ever since then Quinn had become very different. Once Quinn had Beth and came back to school from summer break, Santana was thinking they would regain their dynamic and continue on their destructive path of keeping themselves above everyone else. Santana got a glimpse of the old Quinn when she had schemed her way to get back on the cheerio squad, to which the Latina was not too happy about but the two talked it out and Quinn had apologized knowing she was in the wrong. But in all honesty, Santana knew Quinn made the better captain and didn't find the position all that much fun so the two hugged it out and were friends once again._

_But then things changed. When Santana ordered a hit out on Rachel, Quinn fought her tooth and nail until finally Santana relented and called it off. Santana wasn't scared of anyone or anything but seeing Quinn literally back her into a corner in the bathroom and seeing the veins start to pop out on the girls neck and her eyes almost bulge out of her head, Santana didn't feel so safe and hastily agreed that Quinn was right. That was the last time she ever mentioned "Berry" and "slushie" in the same sentence around the blonde._

_She saw Quinn becoming somewhat friendly to the girl, but Quinn always said it was because since they shared all their classes together, then they were bound to become tolerant of each other and that the diva really wasn't _that _bad. Santana was a little skeptical of her reasons because she shared English with both girls and never saw as much as a single conversation go on between the two, but afraid of another lashing attack from the blonde she shrugged and let it go. Santana knew she was losing her touch around the school by not singling out Rachel but just made it up by slushie-ing other unfortunate students when she felt the urge. She caught Quinn a few times looking over in Rachel's direction but never brought it to the blonde's attention. She didn't like this new, vulnerable Quinn at all and knew Rachel had something to do with it and tried to steer the blonde away from her whenever she could. But when realizing there really was nothing she could do then she eventually let the whole thing go. That still didn't mean that she liked the idea of them becoming chummy._

_Quinn snatched her arm away from Santana, who shook her head, looking back up at the feuding couple, seeing Puck also step up and gave him a nod acknowledging if things started to go down then she would take Rachel and Puck would take Finn. He nodded back saying he got the message._

"_Finn please," Rachel pleaded taking a step into Finn, "you're causing a scene. Please, can we just talk about this later? Let's just go home before this gets out of hand."_

"_Yeah, dude, why don't you just go sleep this off? You've had too much tonight." Puck added, slowly reaching the cup in Finn's hand. Finn turned his attention to Puck's hand and swept his hand as far away as he could from him, splashing liquid onto the ping pong table. Puck took a step back not wanting to push his friend off the edge of sanity._

"_No I haven't! Why is everyone ganging up on me? I haven't done anything wrong. I'm just trying to get Rachel to stay the night here so she doesn't have to worry about not being sober and can loosen up a little." His face was flush with anger._

_No one could believe what they were hearing. They all knew Finn had some slight anger problems but never to this extent. Rachel covered her face and ran out of the room, not being able to stand there and be ridiculed anymore then she already had been._

"_Rachel." Quinn called after her and when she saw her disappear up the stairs she started running after her but not before stopping in front of Finn and burning him with her eyes. "What the fuck was that? Do you see what you did to her? God, could you be any more of an ass?" She shoved him away just to add to her point and get some of her building anger out before continuing her way to Rachel._

_She reached the second floor of the house trying to determine which lucky door Rachel would be behind. She had been to Puck's house before but wasn't entirely familiar with the layout in her state of mind. She started just opening any door she came to until she opened Puck's bedroom door and saw Rachel sitting with her back facing her, near the pillows of his bed. She walked the few steps and plopped down next to Rachel._

"_You okay?" Quinn asked already knowing the answer._

"_No." Rachel answered wiping her eyes of loose tears keeping her head angled away from Quinn. "I can't believe him sometimes. Give me that." Rachel snatched Quinn's drink, that was practically full, out of her hand and drank it down in a few swift gulps. She noticed Rachel had downed her own drink from an empty cup sitting on the nightstand beside the brunette. She slammed the cup down onto the small table and Quinn slid both cups into each other._

"_He's a douche." Quinn stated evenly. "He shouldn't treat you like that. No one should ever treat their girlfriend like that." She lifted her hand to Rachel's chin, forcing her to look Quinn in the eye, using the pad of her thumb to wipe away the trail of water leaking from the brunette's eyes and gave her a lop sided smile which Rachel returned. Quinn could feel a surge of heat rush from her fingertips up her arm and down her spine._

"_Thanks." Rachel whispered. She took a few breathes, finally getting a hold of herself. Quinn dropped her hand from Rachel's cheek and studied every inch of Rachel's face wondering how she could still look this beautiful when she's this sad. She, too, had to take a breath and keep herself under control from the closeness she was just now becoming aware of._

"_Better?" Quinn softly asked. Rachel slightly nodded her head._

"_What happened after I left?" Rachel inquired._

"_Nothing." Quinn said looking away from Rachel with a smirk._

"_Quinn." Rachel said in an accusing voice. "What did you do?" It was obvious Quinn was lying._

"_I just might have pushed him and said a few words." When Quinn looked back at Rachel she saw her eyebrows raised, prying for more information. "He just shouldn't have caused a scene like that." Quinn said defensively. Rachel just kept staring at her. "…I called him an ass." Quinn finally said sheepishly._

_Rachel shook her head and let out a bubble of a giggle, flattered that Quinn would stick up for her like that. "Quinn, you didn't have to do that."_

"_But I did, he needs to know his place. It just frustrates me beyond belief to see him not know what a wonderful girl he has and take advantage of that." Quinn saw those big brown eyes looking back at her with adoration and felt her heart grow larger in her chest._

"_Thank you." Rachel simply stated and Quinn nodded her head not sure of what to say next so they just sat there in a comfortable silence for a few seconds until Quinn felt Rachel's head press against her shoulder. "You really are a wonderful person too, Quinn." Quinn instantly smiled at the compliment._

"_Thank you, Rachel. It means a lot coming from you." Quinn instinctually rested her head atop of Rachel's, breathing in the girl's soft fragrance and closing her eyes to just enjoy the close company._

_Rachel nuzzled her head a little more into Quinn and the blonde really could barely contain herself to not just plant a big one on Rachel's plump lips. _Not a good idea, Fabray. Just enjoy the moment. _And Quinn definitely was. Neither girl realized how long they had stayed in that position until Quinn had felt a pain in her lower back from her slouched posture. She tried arching her upper body up to release some of the tension when Rachel lifted her head in wonderment of what Quinn was doing._

"_Are you okay?" Rachel asked from lazy eyes and Quinn realized Rachel had almost fallen asleep on her shoulder and she grinned._

"_Yeah, my back is just kind of hurting."_

"_Oh, well we can lie down if you want." Quinn's eyes widened a little at the image of having Rachel snuggling into her side._

"_Uh…okay." Quinn finally stammered out scooting to the far end of the bed and adjusting the pillows to a comfortable position. Rachel waited until the blonde was comfortable and once she was, she resumed her position by laying her head against the blonde's shoulder and flung her arm around Quinn's waist. Quinn sat motionless and stiff._

"_It's the smell isn't it?" Rachel suddenly asked propping herself up on her elbow and looking down at Quinn._

_Quinn looked at her in confusion. "What?"_

"_The smell…of the bed. It smells like Puck and I'm sure it makes you uncomfortable." Rachel supplied with Quinn feeling that wave of understanding wash over her._

"_Oh, um, yeah I guess." Quinn said lamely. _What is wrong with you Fabray, get with the picture here. She just needs a shoulder to lean on, literally, and you can't even be that for her. Now get yourself under control._ "I'm sorry, Rach. I'm okay. Really." Quinn finally said, convincing the brunette._

_Rachel nodded her head and took her place again against Quinn. Quinn felt Rachel's body heat as if it were burning through her clothes and her breathing become more erratic as much as she kept trying to steady the pace. After a few minutes, Quinn finally felt herself relax more and closed her eyes as she started to drift to sleep._

"_Do you ever think about her?" Rachel said, bringing Quinn out of her slumber._

"_Beth?"_

_Rachel lifted her chin so she could look Quinn in the eye. "Yeah. Excuse me for asking, but sometimes I just wonder if she's the daughter that my mother always wanted." Rachel looked back down and lowered her voice. "Since she didn't want me."_

_Quinn raised Rachel's chin with her hand and shot Rachel a smile. The girl had a way of doing that to the blonde. "Don't think like that Rach. Think of how different your life would have been if she would have raised you instead of your wonderful fathers you have now? She wasn't ready to be a mother then and wouldn't have known the first thing to do to satisfy a baby, especially one with such a big personality."_

_Rachel pushed her shoulder into Quinn's side. "Hey!"_

_Quinn laughed. "I mean that in the best way possible. But think about it. What if your fathers didn't raise you? How do you think you would have ended up?" She could see Rachel thinking it but not saying anything. "You wouldn't have had these two wonderful people pushing you to pursue your dreams and what you've been destined to be since you were brought into this world." Rachel smiled bashfully at the compliment. "You probably would have gone through life not knowing what to do since Shelby obviously didn't know how to take care of you. And because of that, you probably would have had this void in your heart that you didn't know how to fill so you would have acted out and maybe run away." Rachel looked back up at Quinn, wondering where she was going with this theory. "And with no outlet for your creativity like you have with singing, then you probably would have started experimenting with drugs or killing small animals. Which would have led to you killing actual people, and then you would have been a serial killer and on the run until the cops caught you and then ended up being some woman named Bertha or Butch's cellmate and further sex slave for your whole life." By this time Rachel was sitting up, looking at Quinn with a baffling expression not believing what she just heard._

"_You mean to tell me, Quinn Fabray, that I would have turned out to be someone who harms animals? You know how much I care about them!" Rachel was mocking offensiveness, playing along with Quinn's theory._

_Quinn sat up and crossed her legs under her. "Yeah, but you wouldn't have known that because Shelby just would have never expressed that you need to care about the animals and the environment so it just wouldn't have been a big deal. See, your fathers instilled in you this appreciation for everything that is life and that's how you got that appreciation in the first place." Rachel's jaw had fallen onto the bed. Quinn crossed her arms and leaned back into the pillows. "You know I'm right." She challenged._

_It felt good for Rachel to get her mind off of what had happened earlier that night with Finn and play this silly game with Quinn. "I most certainly do not! I could never harm another living thing. Never in my life." She feigned hurt that Quinn would think of her becoming that kind of person and crossed her arms, jerking her head away from Quinn._

_They both sat there for a few seconds, Quinn feeling the inkling of a laugh coming on at just how ridiculous this all was before Rachel was the first to break and they were both in the midst of a laughing spree. The fell onto their sides still laughing and gasping for air. When they did finally calm down the mood became serious once again._

"_Do you really think so?" Rachel asked, sitting up to meet Quinn's eyes again._

_Quinn sat up as well, keeping her eyes on Rachel's. "I know your fathers did a great job of raising you and I think if it wasn't for them, you wouldn't be the person you are today. Who is definitely one of a kind. I wouldn't want you to be anything less than who you are now." Quinn took Rachel's hand in hers, feeling the electric shock for the second time that night. She saw tears start to well in the brunette's eyes at the touching words Quinn had just said. Before she knew it Rachel launched herself onto Quinn in a massive bear hug and proceeded to let her emotions take over._

"_Thank you so much Quinn. No one has ever said that to me before. I've never thought of it that way. Just, thank you." Rachel was nearly shaking in Quinn's arms as she bawled and Quinn just held the girl tighter, rubbing small circles on her lower back and loving how she was Rachel's shoulder to cry on._

"_I' m sure she's a great mother to Beth." Rachel added, causing Quinn to feel a pull on her heart and felt the sting of tears on the verge of coming to light. Rachel heard the blonde sniffle and kept talking. "It's like she said to me, she missed her chance to be a mom to me, but now she has that opportunity with Beth. You made her dreams come true, Quinn. You gave Beth a life with a wonderful woman and I know they'll both cherish one another." By now it was Quinn's turn to cry and have Rachel hold her shaking form._

_Quinn pulled slowly away from Rachel, letting the brunette wipe away the stray tears and pushed her cheek into her touch, both girls looking into the others eyes with nothing less than what could be call love._

_Neither one knew who began leaning in first, Quinn could have sworn it was Rachel, but Rachel will always say it was Quinn, but before they knew it their foreheads were pressed together. Eyes fluttered closed, each girl taking in breaths of the same air. They could feel the heat radiating of each other's bodies and breathing became labored. Rachel's hand found its way to the inside of Quinn's knee and let her fingertips dance up and down her skin and the blonde's breath hitched and felt her own hand snake up Rachel's arm to the bottom of her neck and heard the girl take a sharp breath in and hold it._

You've got your ball

You've got your chain

Tied to me tight, tie me up again

Who's got the claws in you my friend?  
Into your heart I'll beat again  
Sweet like candy to my soul  
Sweet you rock

And sweet you roll  
Lost for you I'm so lost for you

Oh, when you come crash into me  
And I come into you  
I come into you

_Quinn opened her eyes to see Rachel's still closed and traced her fingertips along her skin down to her collar bone and up the opposite one, her eyes glued to her own movements, memorizing every inch of skin she covered. Her hand came to rest along Rachel's jaw and her thumb brushed along her bottom lip. As brown eyes opened, they locked onto hazel and both girls were surprised at how dark the pair was looking back at them._

Touch your lips just so I know  
In your eyes, love, it glows so  
I'm bare boned and crazy, for you

Oh, when you come crash into me, dear  
Baby, and I come into you  
In a boys dream  
In a boys dream

_Quinn felt Rachel's chin lift up and followed her motions as eyes closed shut again, feeling their noses graze and they repositioned their head so they could get as close as humanly possible. Both girls were holding their breath, waiting for the slightest of movement to cause their lips to collide together. Quicker than either one could realize, their lips were covering the other pair. Quinn opened her eyes wide, not sure if this was really happening, but when she saw Rachel's eyes closed tight and her brows slightly scrunched together, she knew it was real and responded immediately. Quinn inhaled deeply through her nose, bringing both hands up to tangle into Rachel's brown locks and the brunette did the same, keeping one hand on Quinn's shoulder, running up her neck and finally cupping the girl's cheek._

If I've gone overboard  
Then I'm begging you to forgive me in my haste  
When I'm holding you so, girl  
Close to me

Oh and you come crash into me, yeah  
Baby, and I come into you

_Lips parted slightly to add more passion and each girl could feel their lips becoming bruised but that didn't stop them from pressing harder into each other. Neither could get enough of the others touch and hands roamed bodies freely, but never pushing a step further than heavy petting. _

_Quinn felt a tongue graze her bottom lip which she didn't hesitate to allow past her lips. Soft moans filled the room as tongues became introduced and began to duel. Quinn slowly guided Rachel down onto her back until they were both lying down with Quinn hovering over Rachel, propping herself up on her elbow keeping one hand behind Rachel's neck with her other gripped onto her hip. Rachel's hands were busy running through blonde hair and down Quinn's back. _

Hike up your skirt a little more  
Show your world to me  
Hike up your skirt a little more  
Show your world to me  
In a boys dream  
In a boys dream

_Fueled by her lust and desire, Quinn decided to take it a step further and slowly lifted the bottom of Rachel's shirt and gently ran her fingers along the girl's waist and up her stomach. Rachel slightly arched her back into her touch and her head fell back, breaking their kiss. Quinn was mesmerized by the brunette's reaction to a simple touch and knew right then she could never get enough of that. Her eyes darted between every feature of Rachel's face, from her flushed cheeks to her closed eyes to her mouth hanging slightly open, and drifting to the column of her neck._

Oh I watch you there  
Through the window  
And I stare at you  
You wear nothing but you wear it so well  
Tied up and twisted

The way I'd like to be  
For you, for me  
Come crash into me, baby  
Come crash into me, yeah

Crash into me  
Crash into me  
Crash into me

_Acting off pure instinct Quinn lowered her head and began to spread wet kisses up and down, covering any inch of skin she could reach. She felt Rachel's pulse under her lips and gently began to suck, not wanting to leave a mark. Quinn could feel the vibrations coming from the girl's throat as Rachel continued to softly moan gripping onto the roots of Quinn's hair, her body writhing beneath the blonde desperate for more._

I'm the king of the castle  
You're the dirty rascal  
Come crash into me  
Please crash into me

Yes, I see the waves  
Come and crash into me  
See the waves come and crash into me  
Crash into me

_They heard a loud knocking on the door and jiggling of the door handle of someone trying to get in the room and, as if struck by lightning, jumped apart and off opposite sides of the bed._

"_Hey! Let me in! It is my room!" They heard Puck on the other side and Quinn didn't even remember shutting and locking the door._

_They both stood, turning to each other and taking in flushed faces, disheveled hair, still labored breaths, passion and desire still hanging thick in the air. They tried their best to straighten their clothes and make their hair look somewhat presentable. Quinn looked over to Rachel to see if she was ready for the intruder and when she gave the blonde a quick nod, Quinn turned the knob and saw an almost nervous Puck in the hallway._

_He stepped into his room and saw the state of his bed. The covers were bunched in some areas and pillows on the floor. "What the hell happened in here? Did you guys have a pillow fight or something? That would be so hot if you did." He looked between the girls with a smirk._

_They both rolled their eyes. "What do you want Puckerman?" Quinn asked, glancing at Rachel who was finding her hands much more interesting at the moment. Quinn was scared she regretted what happened._

_He stepped towards Rachel, who looked up at the boy. "Um, Kurt decided to give Finn a ride back home with Mercedes and Blaine. There's plenty of room you here if you want to stay."_

"_No, I think I'll get on home too. Thanks Puck." She was exiting the room when Quinn caught her by the wrist._

_"Rach, you've been drinking. I don't want you driving. You should just stay here tonight. Santana, Brittany, and I are all staying here too so you wouldn't be the only one. I'm guessing Mike and Tina are still here too so it will be all of us."_

"_No, they left. Turns out Mike had just been drinking soda all night. Sneaky bastard. But it looks like you guys already got comfortable on my bed so you guys can just bunk in here together if you want." Puck chimed in. Quinn took in his words and turned back to Rachel with pleading eyes for her to stay._

"_I appreciate that, but I'd rather just stay on the couch or another bed if that's okay." Quinn let go of Rachel's arm and almost let her coming tears fall but she willed herself to not let them. Not until she was alone._

"_Okay, that's fine too. I think there are some extra sheets in the closet. I'll go get them and make up your bed." Puck said, oblivious of what had just happened, and walked out of the room._

_Quinn looked down to Rachel, waiting for her to say something. But nothing came. Rachel wouldn't even look in Quinn's direction before she whispered out, "I'm sorry" and left. Quinn slept alone in Puck's bed, letting her tears fall until she was convinced she had none left to shed and drifted to dreamless sleep._

_She awoke the next morning with Rachel already gone and come the next Monday at school, it was as if nothing had ever happened with Rachel when Quinn was ready to pull her hair out from the anxiety that that night had caused her and expected to talk about it to some degree with the girl. But Rachel had been so wrapped up in Finn during the time that Quinn never had the opportunity and eventually it just went seemingly forgotten to the brunette and Quinn didn't want to be the one to bring it up, seeing how happy Rachel was with Finn. And so Quinn, after some time, thought she might have just dreamt it all up and it didn't happen in the first place. But her emotions were too real to have it be a dream but she could never gain the courage to simply say something when she and Rachel were alone._

Not until now.

"Do you remember that night at Puck's party?" Quinn could feel the tension started to circulate through the room and Rachel stared up at the ceiling.

"You mean when Finn and I got into that fight? Yeah, that was pretty bad, wasn't it? But I can assure you that nothing like that has ever happened since. He learned from his mistakes."

"You know what I mean Rachel." She kept her eyes locked on Rachel's face for any indication that the girl actually _did _remember.

Rachel closed her eyes and took in the events of that night, remembering everything clearly. She hadn't thought of the details since that next day when she told herself that it never happened and not to act like it ever did, to completely forget it and that's when she threw herself into her relationship even more. She took a deep breath and opened her eyes again, still looking up at the ceiling. "In Puck's room?" She saw Quinn nod out of the corner of her eye. "Yes, I remember very clearly." She turned to meet Quinn's gaze. "What about it?"

Quinn sat up on her elbow, her hand propping her head up. "We've just…never talked about…it." She had no idea how to start this conversation.

"What is there to talk about? You kissed me. That's all that happened." Rachel sat up on her bed looking down at the blonde.

Quinn felt her blood start to boil. "_I _kissed _you?_ Are you sure you were in the same room I was? I'm pretty sure you kissed me."

"I find that very hard to believe considering I distinctly remember you being on top of me."

"You're the one who got tongues involved."

"You laid me down on the bed!"

"You laid down first! I was simply following you down!"

"You tried to take my shirt off!"

"Oh, please! I just ran my fingers over your stomach! Which you _loved_ by the way! The way you arched your back and let your head fall kind of gave it away. Not to mention the sounds you made and the way you were practically squirming under me. Like you wanted more." Quinn heard her voice grow quiet and raspy and glanced at Rachel wondering if she heard it too.

Rachel's pupil's were blown and was biting down on the corner of her bottom lip. _Dear lord. _They found themselves in a similar predicament for a second time. Quinn reached over to Rachel's hand and lightly squeezed it. They were both very slowly leaning into each other, both knowing exactly what they were doing and where this was going.

Only this time, when they were breaths apart, Rachel leaned back quickly. "I can't do this." She whispered out.

Quinn stayed frozen feeling both confused and completely rejected. "What's wrong?" She awkwardly leaned back looking at Rachel.

Rachel bowed her head and mumbled something under her breath. "What?" Quinn softly asked trying to bring Rachel to look at her.

"I said I have a boyfriend." She swatted Quinn's hand away."I can't do this, Quinn. I have Finn and I'm happy with him."

Quinn narrowed her eyes at the brunette, not believe a word out of her mouth. "Bull_shit._ Do you not remember how you were acting when I first came in here tonight? You were saying how stupid you were for getting back together with him and now you're using him as your excuse? You make no sense sometimes."

"Please," Rachel pleaded, looking up to Quinn through watery eyes. "Don't make this harder than it needs to be."

Quinn saw the girls struggle and felt her heart ache. "It doesn't have to be this hard." Quinn tried to take Rachel's hand, but at her touch Rachel flinched away and stood from the bed.

"I told you I can't do this." Quinn was caught off guard by the venom in the brunette's voice and the fire in her eyes, with a single tear falling down her tanned cheek. The blonde narrowed her eyes again trying to get a read on her. "Just please respect that." As fast as that anger came, it went even quicker. Rachel couldn't look Quinn in the eye, and turned her back to the blonde, not having the courage to see the girl's reaction.

When Rachel turned around, she saw the clothes Quinn borrowed thrown on her bed and looked to her dresser only to see Quinn's dress and shoes gone with the blonde nowhere to be found.

Quinn quickly found her mother in the crowd of people and grabbed her hand pulling her to the car. But not before Judy remembered to grab her purse from the closet.

"Quinnie, what's wrong honey? Did something happen between you and Rachel?" Judy had almost tripped out the door and was having trouble keeping up.

"I don't want to talk about it. I just need to get home. Now."

The pair came to a stop in front of Judy's car and the older blonde began searching through her purse for the keys. Quinn was growing impatient and walked over to her mother, snatching the bag from her hands and searching quickly for the keys which took her no time to find. She looked at her mother questioningly.

"Oh, good, you found them. You might want to drive too, honey. I might have had too much of that delicious champagne." Judy began walking to the passenger's side of the car, leaning on the hood for support. Quinn rolled her eyes, unlocking both doors with the keyless entry and hopped into the driver's side, cranking the engine.

Once they were both buckled in, Quinn took one last look up to Rachel's window and saw the girl standing in the frame, wiping tears from her eyes. Quinn shook her head, leaning back into the seat, and pressed on the accelerator, pulling the car away from the curb and heading home. _Here we go again._

* * *

**Song: Dave Matthew's Band "Crash Into Me"**_  
_


End file.
